I Cannot Believe I Did It!

[Meg_porter94]

Earlier today I posted a Thread titled "4 days to 4 years".
Basically an anniversary, that marks my trauma.

I have flashbacks, that bring me right back to it. I can feel smell and hear it again. Most of the time I really have the urges to self harm. But today was completely different.

I am babysitting this weekend. While the kids are in bed I take a shower, tonight I had a really, really bad flash back that took the air straight out of me. But then,I saw the bath tub markers. I started writing every emotion that I was feeling that was negative. With each negative I would put an emotion I want in place of the negative.
Through out the shower I saw that only the negatives were washing away the quickest. And as they were washing away, I could feel those emotions go away.

When I was just about to get out I looked at the positive and I really focused on them, and I let myself feel them and then washed them away. Normally I despise Dora The Explorer (for anyone who has watched it) but tonight I started singing the song! I just can't believe I was able to do this. Tomorrow First thing I am going to the store to buy me some of these markers.

I encourage people who are similar to my story to try this. See if it works or not!

 

[EvenStrongerNow]

That's so awesome Meg. Thanks for sharing this. How do I find these markers? :D

 

[seedling]

What a great technique! Thinking of you at the anniversary, it brings the "worst" but also, over time, it can bring a lot of healing.

StrongerNow - got to start shopping like a kid! :tup:

 

[Storm-ridden]

That really is a fantastic idea!! Thanks for sharing! Glad it made you feel so much better. :)

 

[Deleted member 20280]

Fantastic accomplishment @Meg_porter94

Brilliant news ((Hugs))

And yes @StrongerNow try any good kids store they are water soluble crayons especially designed for kids to make a right mess in the bathroom (mine used to colour in the grout lines between the tiles. (NOT recommended though as it is a right swine to clean off :) )

Meg well done for resisting self cutting an accomplishment in itself.

 

[Meg_porter94]

Thank you everyone!!!

You can find them all with the kids shampoo and soap! They have crayons or markers.

 

[Britt.f7]

That is awesome! What a great idea!

 

[franciemarnie]

Hooray!! How creative and cool. It's by thinking outside the box sometimes that we can achieve so much. Celebrate!