I Can't Remember What I'm Supposed To Do

[atilla]

Well said Spock.

Holding down a job and managing a family is tough enough for most. Now throw PTSD into that mix somedays it feels impossible. But we manage to soldier on.

Brother your doing it though. Your going to hit snags along the way. The dishes...get up and was one. Rest. But you'll see that the one probably wasn't that difficult.

We are going to hit setbacks. For me, managing the stress in PTSD is key to most of this shit.

I work full time and my job does get stressful sometimes. I do help my wife out around the house though. I take my time doing things like the dishes, and my wife understands that i really cant handle a timeline to get the stuff done, so...it has taken me half the day to get them done. Usually i help out on the weekends...do a few dishes...drink a beer..lol.. take your time, set your own pace. Dishes should not cause stress, but they do. Drive on...at a reduced speed.

 

[Friday]

Also Peeps... Please don't forget:

- Car broken > Mechanic
- Eletrical Fritz > Electrician
- Kids education > Teacher
- Taxes > Accountant
- Owee Muscles > Massage Therapist
- Clothing Alteration > Seamstress
- Food > Restaraunt

These and dozens of other things are common areas that people hire done. Either because they can't do it, or they damn well can, but are making the choice to delegate.

- Messy House > Maid

Is a totally valid option to hire out or delegate. Yes. We all can clean like motherf*ckers. Just because we can, doesn't mean we should.

 

[atilla]

Also Peeps... Please don't forget:

- Car broken > Mechanic
- Eletrical Fritz > Electrician
- Kids education > Teacher
- Taxes > Accountant
- Owee Muscles > Massage Therapist
- Clothing Alteration > Seamstress
- Food > Restaraunt

These and dozens of other things are common areas that people hire done. Either because they can't do it, or they damn well can, but are making the choice to delegate.

- Messy House > Maid

Is a totally valid option to hire out or delegate. Yes. We all can clean like motherf*ckers. Just because we can, doesn't mean we should.

It's hard for me to delegate stuff that I can do myself, even if it does cause more stress. I guess it goes back to that grunt mentality to not fail ever, at any task. I help my wife out because she has been there for me in the worst of times, and she's my partner in the fight against the beast, so it doesn't hurt me to help her with the housework..lol

 

[Jimmy1]

It's hard to explain to people how overwhelming it is for us now. Once upon a time I was a Warrant Officer. You could throw a thousand things at me and I would prioritise, then delegate if I had man power, if not, I started at the top of the heap sometimes two at a time.
Now that the beast has it's claws in me, you give me a list of more than three things for a whole day and I will go to pieces, if left by myself.
It took forever to convince my wife that a sock on the floor means nothing to me. So now she will hint and elude to something that needs doing. It shits me to tears, but I get the message. The other day I wrote a list of a few things, got up early, could not find the list, so I played computer games all day and made some bullshit excuse to my wife, why, well we have an open house on Sunday (our house is on the market and we have to disappear so people can walk through), so everything has to be in tip top shape, and Margaret has been working.
So, I have mowed and whipper snipped the whole acre of land, cleaned the garage up, and still managed to play a heap of levels on my game.

 

[Kaishi]

Congratz getting that lot done, Jimmy.

Lists are life-saviors. I do them all the time. Paper lists, phone lists, all those funny notifications bs functions put to some use, hell telling friends if it's something 'super important' to remind me, one of those administrative nonsense things that always slip me or I don't care for. Don't think it's any less prioritizing just because it can't be done off the top o' my head. But it's time eater, yeah.

 

[Jimmy1]

But the whole point is that lists are so overwhelming, an evil necessity. People should treat us like a small child. It's what we are like. If you told a 5 year old he had to clean his floor, and I mean his whole floor, clean up his toys, make his bed, and pick up any toys in the rest of the house, and outside, he would lay on the floor kicking his legs. Change toys to tools and insert us men, and we will be laying on the floor kicking our legs.
You hearing me..........
If you tell a 5 year old that they can be really helpful if they pick up their toys, when they come back, give them praise and a cookie, then ask them to do the next choir and so on and so on. Then when Mum comes home you tell her how wonderful you have been.

The same with a veteran with PTSD. You ask him to do a job, when he comes back, give him praise and a beer and tell him to put his feet up for an hour, then if he feels like it, do another one.

This will work, or is worth trying.

;)

 

[holdenmonty]

I couldn't have said it better myself Jimmy. I'm thinking that is why in my office getting the records management program and the computer inventory are two daunting tasks for me. Nothing has been done with the records management program in 4 years... and I have to track down 50+ computers in four different areas of the building I work in. They are both tasks that will take at the least three or four days if everything goes smoothly which I already know won't so they are both pretty much tasks that will end up taking probably about a whole week each.