I Feel Like I'm Loosing Myself

[Chris 173rd]

thanks sarge, i agree, becoming a workaholic will tame the beast. espically once i see the money i'll be making, the bills being paid, the vacations i can take with my family, and all the other things i can buy for my home that i didn't have the money for before, will make me feel a little bit more "welcome" in this economy. i'll see that i do in fact have a place in the world, and not be so hard on myself. feeling that things are never good enough will be come a thing of the past. (y)

 

[arwarfighter]

Wishing you the best.

 

[Jimmy1]

thanks sarge, i agree, becoming a workaholic will tame the beast. espically once i see the money i'll be making, the bills being paid, the vacations i can take with my family, and all the other things i can buy for my home that i didn't have the money for before, will make me feel a little bit more "welcome" in this economy. i'll see that i do in fact have a place in the world, and not be so hard on myself. feeling that things are never good enough will be come a thing of the past. (y)

Chris, this is just my opinion, or call it my experience. Here are two examples: The first one is a Nam veteran I know. When he got home he got council approval to extend his house and changed it from a tiny 3 bedroom house to a massive 6 bedroom, 3 bathroom place with a huge games room. He worked on it for 20 years. One day he stopped and the beast pounced.

The second scenario happened to me. I returned from operations in East Timor in 2002. Signs of the beast started showing and I went for help. They said I was just having family issues and needed to keep my work at work. f*cking arseholes. So they sent me North to a Rapid Deployment Squadron. There I did not have time for the beast. It was work, work, work, course, course, course, then Iraq. Just before I returned they promoted me which meant another posting. That was to a reserve unit which did nothing. The beast pounced with all its pent up rage. I am still trying to recover from that now.

My word of advice is this. By all means become a workaholic, but also seek help to tame the beast.

You know, I am fortunate and have been looked after. I earn enough money now that I am comfortable. I own a brand new car, and am hunting around to buy a house. But you know what. All the money in the world means shit to me as the beast will ruin it all if you let it.

Just an opinion.

 

[arwarfighter]

Chris, this is just my opinion, or call it my experience. Here are two examples: The first one is a Nam veteran I know. When he got home he got council approval to extend his house and changed it from a tiny 3 bedroom house to a massive 6 bedroom, 3 bathroom place with a huge games room. He worked on it for 20 years. One day he stopped and the beast pounced.

The second scenario happened to me. I returned from operations in East Timor in 2002. Signs of the beast started showing and I went for help. They said I was just having family issues and needed to keep my work at work. f*cking arseholes. So they sent me North to a Rapid Deployment Squadron. There I did not have time for the beast. It was work, work, work, course, course, course, then Iraq. Just before I returned they promoted me which meant another posting. That was to a reserve unit which did nothing. The beast pounced with all its pent up rage. I am still trying to recover from that now.

My word of advice is this. By all means become a workaholic, but also seek help to tame the beast.

You know, I am fortunate and have been looked after. I earn enough money now that I am comfortable. I own a brand new car, and am hunting around to buy a house. But you know what. All the money in the world means shit to me as the beast will ruin it all if you let it.

Just an opinion.

My wife's father was a recon troop in Nam. He came home and worked like mad. Noone really noticed too many symptoms of the beast in him. For years he went along fine. He worked from sun-up to sun-down. Then when age started to creep up on him and he was no longer able to work like that the symptoms came back. Only now they'd had plenty time to stew and sink in. By the time he realised that something was wrong the beast had almost destryed him. Now he is 100% service connected for ptsd, lives alone, and gets more of his daily calories from meds than from food. Oh, and he drinks like a fish. Other than that he's fine. I think being a "workaholic" may in the short term give you the distraction you need to get some things straight, but working without seeking real help is not going to solve anything in the long run. The only REAL way to deal with the beast is to seek help from professionals. That can not be stressed enough.

 

[Wagon]

My experience with the workaholic method....and unchecked beast. My Dad took this route. 35 years in a factory. Mr. Overtime. Lived two years of his retirement and died. Age 61. It kept him busy, but quality of life and enjoyment were not the best. He also drank himself through most of it.

Then you got today. Hard work pays off. You work hard, you get more money. Work hard, get promoted...uh oh. Ok so you tackle the new job. Work even harder. Get promoted again, more money. The problem is by this time, you will find it hard to live up to the standards you have set yourself. The stress levels get higher and higher. If you have the beast and it's untreated this is a recipe for a train wreck. I can attest. It ain't pretty.

At the end of my run, I was abt 60lbs overweight, a little more than slightly psychotic, had a hard time remembering simple things, heavy drinker, drug usage, and really just a big sweaty asshole. Most likely a few steps away from a heart attack at all times.

As Jimmy said. You have to take care of the beast. Otherwise everything else in life is not going to be permanent.

Hang tough
Wagon

 

[Anglesachse]

Well the last couple of post cover it in my opinion.

It is all just a distraction from the problem, and problems ignored don`t go away. Never worked for the Ostrich either.

 

[JarHed]

I think that's why so many Nam vets don't realize that they even have a problem till they get older and either slow down on the work or retire. That seems to open the door to it all. Being busy is great but it really doesn't take the place of real therapy. Avoiding our problems has always been the source of even worse problems arising.

Having a diversion is OK. Totally focusing on work or anything else is just another way to avoid the real problem as I see it. Just an opinion of course.

It's always been my experience that nothing goes away or gets done without really doing something about it. I wish it would as well but I've just never seen it happen that way.

Jar

 

[Tim Cake]

Doing some physical work (lift and put), walking the dogs or jogging -- all of these help me straighten out my head without the resort to medication.

 

[Tim Cake]

Doing some physical work (lift and put), walking the dogs or jogging -- all of these help me straighten out my head without the resort to medication.

 

[JarHed]

Doing some physical work (lift and put), walking the dogs or jogging -- all of these help me straighten out my head without the resort to medication.

Hey Tim

It helps me to sleep better also.

 

[The Hermit King]

Doing some physical work (lift and put), walking the dogs or jogging -- all of these help me straighten out my head without the resort to medication.

Hey Tim

It helps me to sleep better also.

Ain't that the damn truth. I do a lot of unusual physical training now a days but the number one weapon I have against the Beast is my trusty KETTLEBELLS. They are my medicine now. Kettlebells will give you intestinal fortitude and weaken the Beast. Oh and women can use them too if your wife is into that sort of thing. It works great for depression and anger but if you are extremely anti-social like me it really doesnt do shit for that. www.dragondoor.com has a ton of information on all kinds of fitness stuff in the forums there for free. PT is the only thing that keeps me sane. I hope you find something that helps too bro.

Now, Lurker Mode....ACTIVATED.

 

[JarHed]

Now, Lurker Mode....ACTIVATED.

Hey Chemlight

Just so you know we've developed some counter measures that allow us to detect lurkers. We then send them a case of green beer. :ROFLMAO:

Jar