I feel very insignificant

[Punky143]

To anyone feeling the same, know your not alone. I exist for other people's gain. I try speak up knowing what the aftermath will bring. Recently I shared concerns with my husband about getting a dog, it's not a good idea (x,y,z) and yet he went ahead and got one. He didn't listen to us (I have DID) think about it will effect my schedule and my mental health. I'm hurt.
My daughter will take advantage of me and be rotten. I let her know it hurts my feelings. She still does it. But she's 18 which doesn't give her a pass.
I don't have any friends. It seems like DID has taken over our life for a few years now making it hard to have because of our inconsistent moods.
I do most of the housework on a daily basis and no one even acknowledges it.
And on and on. I don't even know myself anymore. Depressed. Can anyone else relate

 

[whiteraven]

Oh, yeah. I'm sorry, @Punky143. It's a shitty way to feel. I had hoped when the DID was not a primary focus anymore, I'd feel better, but I don't.

No advice, but I can totally relate. You are not alone!

 

[RainbowSearchParty]

I think (as another human with DID) that it can often feel like we are only there for other's needs, but this isn't true. You are super valuable as you -- and I think it is so important, fundamentally, to remember that.

One thing that has helped me is making a conscious choice to caretake, rather than feeling obligated. My actions didn't really change, but it makes me feel in power of the decision to do what I do. I don't know if that helps? But you are not alone.

 

[Survivor3]

Hi @Punky143 , sorry you feel so down. would you not enjoy the comfort of a pet? Taking the dog for a walk and having that space? Also, how about getting a hobby? It could be anything, you would meet more people.

 

[Punky143]

Oh, yeah. I'm sorry, @Punky143. It's a shitty way to feel. I had hoped when the DID was not a primary focus anymore, I'd feel better, but I don't.

No advice, but I can totally relate. You are not alone!

I appreciate your honesty and I'm saying that in a nice way. It makes me sad knowing people don't understand it and big shout out to the cinema industry for portraying us as dangerous and violent.
I don't have days off and I'm not talking about work. My head is full time/the parts are not aligned so everything feels chaotic. I also have a full time job that doesn't require interacting with other people. Occasionally we will try and be nice to the other lady. But in reality, it's easier to work in silence. I wish I lived in silence.
Best of luck. Stay in touch if you want.

 

[Punky143]

I feel like I've tried many different "techniques" and some would work for a bit but then the information is lost. Guilt. I feel like we're programmed to feel guilty for everything we do. Clearly that mindset overall holds us back. Lots of feelings lately but thank you for your encouraging and thoughtful words

 

[Sideways]

I feel like we're programmed to feel guilty for everything we do.

In a way, you may have been. Not necessarily intentionally. But that doesn’t make it any less significant.

I have to spend a lot of time looking after my parts, making sure they’re all okay.

It’s just as necessary, though, to make sure I’m doing things just for me. Things that make me feel good. Things that make me feel worthwhile.

So, hearing you. I’m sorry you’re carrying guilt. It’s not warranted.