I Just Realized Why I'm Still Hurting So Badly.

[LittleBear]

I'm scared to be happy again because every time I've been happy in my life...someone close and or critically important to me died.

Now Sazza...I am signing off for a little while.

LBear

 

[Nicolette]

Now Sazza...

Hi LBear

I am sorry you are hurting so badly and it's never easy to handle someone close dying.

Would you kindly explain how Sazza has added to your hurt as she is feeling bad and somewhat confused as I am.

Please see [DLMURL]https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/threads/i-would-like-to-apologise.21940/[/DLMURL]

Thanks

 

[Phoenix_Rising]

((((Littlebear))))

Sorry to you and Sazza both that this turned into something like this... Especially when you are hurting... And it ended up being public (through no fault of anyone's) for you both.

((((Sazza))))

Hang in there guys :) Appreciate you both :)

And you too, Nicolette, for trying to deal with it in the manner you are :)

 

[LittleBear]

I meant nothing hurtful to Sazza at all. On a previous thread I had mentioned to her I was signing off. I was in a dark and very hurting place after signing off this current thread and haven't returned since the initial post. The comment to Sazza was actually one when I was considering her because I had told her previously I was signing off.

Again, as has been my entire life, a gesture of consideration and kindness...hurts someone. I have an incredibly difficult time communicating what I mean when I try to communicate.

Sazza...I appreciate you.

LBear

 

[Phoenix_Rising]

I think it was just one of those "things that happen" miscommunications... I don't think you did anything wrong Little Bear :)

I'm glad you came back, and hope you are doing better :inlove:

 

[Srain]

I think it's very easy to misunderstand what another member "says" in writing as it difficult to embed infliction or tone with words and often what happens is what I believe, for me, how I perceive a message is not necessarily how another does.

What I am learning is the act of simply asking if there is a problem or misunderstanding. It seems easy enough but it can be quite difficult to even get past emotions or reactions and get clear as the solution to the problem. At least for me.

I think you did well to come forward and try to deal with this.

 

[The Albatross]

I can relate, Little Bear to being scared to be happy again. Part of my depressive aspect is "situational depression"... I've been "taught" by those closest to me that I will be betrayed. I do okay for short bursts, but it continues to confound me a bit.

People close to me started dying when I was 9. Mid life, as losses began accumulating... I had a friend from Mobile tell me in her sweet southern magnolia blossom accented voice, "Sug', we're in our 40's... losses are a fact for us... it's how we manage them and cope that's gonna make or break us."