General I love his cool head, i just do

[Never_falter2]

Basically there was a problem and some people we know blamed it on my vet (who was not to blame by the way), vet pointed out he was not to blame but instead of starting a conflict solved the problem, told everybody „see, I solved it, no need to quarrel anymore“. I was so proud of him.

How sweetheart.

Vet can be an extremely good problem solver...

There is something about him that makes him one of the least crazy persons I know and I guess it is really odd to say this of a mentally ill person... but he does not let all this „petty drama“ in everyday life influence his decisions.

 

[mumstheword]

It's not really, technically, a mental illness, it's more of a brain/nervous system injury.

Despite what many "health professionals" call it, some of us are very sick of the stigma, of being considered "mentally ill", when it's that extreme events have thrown our brains into hyper-survival mode and often for ongoing lengths of time.

I, too, have had people say to me "you're one of the sanest people I know" , I'm still a hyper survivor though.

 

[Never_falter2]

So sorry if what I said was offensive.
I just wanted to say that one would expect a persons with ptsd to be the one most likely to „freak out“ or act irrational... and while my guy has some pretty irrational fears... he is often just the opposite.

I really like his calm and dependability.

 

[mumstheword]

That's the thing though, people with PTSD are just as likely to "keep their heads" as they know, too well, the danger of not.

It's all about the premise. Your premise of what constitutes someone with ptsd is kind of insulting. It's what we cop all the time, as if we aren't "normal people", we are, we are just normal people who've survived through extraordinary things, and are left with some nasty brain injury effects.

We aren't "more fearful" than others, in fact because of what we've survived we are often much less likely to "sweat the small stuff", we just have brains wired for survival, just like everyone else, only ours have been put under extreme threat for too long.

But hey:joyful: I'm glad you love your awesome guy, I love mine too, he never ceases to amaze me and he's come back from a brain injury that left him unable to read, write or talk on top of unbelievable and ongoing traumas and abuse.
We are both very level headed and good in a crisis, I guess it's all the opportunities to practise that make us so.:angelic:

 

[Sweetpea76]

@mumstheword this is the supporter section. If it offends you, don't read it.

 

[mumstheword]

@mumstheword this is the supporter section. If it offends you, don't read it.[/QU...

I'm ok, I'm not going to have a meltdown about it or anything.
That's the thing though, isn't it? One doesn't know how one feels about something until after one reads it.
I hope I didn't offend with my input.
We read all sorts of heavy things on here (as in myptsd) if we were faint-hearted and "too fragile and precious" we wouldn't expose ourselves, daily, to others horrendous suffering and be ready and willing to try lend a supportive mind and heart, so yeah ....Just sayin':giggle:

 

[Sweetpea76]

While sufferer input is welcome most of the time, this isn't the place to come over and take offense or nitpick language usage. Your whole tangent has derailed this thread.

The supporter section is a small area. You have the whole rest of the forum to deal with other issues. We get precious little support for ourselves and have to tiptoe around our own sufferers' feelings and outbursts all day. We shouldn't have to do it here in an area set up for supporters.

Last time I'm going to say it. If you're offended by things you read in the supporter section, then don't read it and post elsewhere.

 

[mumstheword]

I'm a supporter too, so I'm entitled to post here if I wish too.
Sorry I've offended you or triggered you in any way.
I was just trying to point out that having the diagnosis doesn't automatically equate to being a "hot head" or being emotionally and socially incompetent, and treating us as if it's expected that we will "go to pieces" in a crisis just furthers the stigmatization that adds to our difficulties in society.
I get it though, me and my opinions are not welcome in the "supporters" section even though I also fit the category of supporter as my input is upsetting and not appreciated here.
I'll make sure to check whether it's the supporters or the sufferers section and post accordingly, in future. And I say all this with so little emotional charge,.I've actually got way bigger things to be upset about.

Being socially excluded has been an ongoing theme in my life, so I'm really accustomed to that, so this is just more of the same for me.

 

[Never_falter2]

Oh weh! Geez. It was not my intention to cause such a discussion.

I do not think @Sweetpea76 has been trying to exclude you @mumstheword. She is just sharing her opinion.

No, I do not think my vet is in anyway incompetent or expect him to go to pieces. I actually do think he is very smart and competent and I often turn to him when there is a problem and often he is able to solve it.

OTOH... and that is off topic... I know that there are some things that made him feel pretty fearful (though he often does not show) and by now I know. I really do not think it would be a good idea to expect my hubby to cope with crowds like everybody else because while hefypically does not freak out he does feel dispirited and timid... and of course in that case I have to expect that he is a bit more „fragile“... yes... and not hold him to the same standards I would hold another person.

 

[mumstheword]

I also did not really mean.to derail or invalidate.
My guy is amazing but wouldn't be socially comfortable in many, many instances and I wouldn't pressure him either.

I'm sorry I was so snappy and oversensitive.

I've lost a friend at his own hand lately and I think I was just acting out a little, I retract my grumpy taking-any-of-it-out-on-you-guys.

I do appreciate that, your lovely guy is good in what could be a high pressure situation and it was chilled out by your chill (in that situation) fellow.
I also appreciate the patience, support and proactivity that you supporters demonstrate here.

 

[Gs172003]

So sorry if what I said was offensive.
I just wanted to say that one would expect a persons with p...

I'm also tired of hearing "don't freak out" over any and everything.

 

[Gs172003]

Sorry I didn't see that I wasn't supposed to.mention that. My apologies.