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Relationship In Need Of Support Myself

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hangingon

Bronze Member
My vet has been distant. Yet he would text me everyday. His messages were brief but always there. Then if I responded or initiated conversation it was a high probability of no answer or hours later a one word answer. I have backed off quite a bit. Then he talked about me taking the same day off work that he had so we could spend the day together. I was so happy. I took the day off work. He tells me the night before that he did not have the day off anymore. We discuss having a couple hours together before work instead of an entire day. We did that. He kissed me and hugged me and we had a good few hours. We made plans Saturday (yesterday). Friday evening he breaks those plans and moves our plans to today. I knew at this point I wasn't going to see him. He has been feeling guilty saying I deserve someone better, that he is unsure if he is the best person to make me happy, that he is evil. I assure you he is the furthest from evil. I told him I require nothing more than what he is able to do. I have been praying for him daily. I pray that he has peace and happiness even if it is without me. this is the first relationship I can truly say I have felt unconditional love towards someone else. I received a message late last night that he needs to be alone for a while. He said he still cares about me and is not going to be forgetting about me. This is basically what I see as a break up. After some crying to myself and prayer, told him I will abide by his need to be alone, I cherish the time we've had and will love him always.
 
((((hugs))) If you accept.

Take it one day at a time. Stay among us for a bit and receive some comfort. Perhaps read other supporters or those with PTSD. It is good to understand the whirlwind...because sometimes not always it is a mood swing. I am not offering false hope, just saying...some of us push those whom love us away at times in our depression.

As well you deserve to understand about PTSD as it influenced your life and we care. So stay ...OK?
 
He's been distant & depressed before. It feels different this time. My heart is completely full of love for him. I am & will be here for him but silently I guess. I have been reading so much about ptsd, combat ptsd in particular. I have a friend who suffers as well but has gotten to a pretty stable place. I am able to draw support & insight there as well. I will always harbor hope but I am realistic too. He's been gradually more distant, replacing the word love with "care about"
 
It's not right that you're left feeling unsure and sad. You have the right to know where you stand. Can you tell him how you're feeling and that you need clarification?
 
I can understand your pain. My husband hasn't told me , he loves me for awhile now. He can say it to others but not me. But he does show me he is trying to work on our marriage, by his actions. It's what keeps me hanging on. I think your doing the right thing for you. You are a very strong and beautiful person. I wish you happiness.
 
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