Sexual Assault Is This Sexual Assault? Please Help

[The Albatross]

Okay color me confused... since when do moderators and/or admin steer the direction of threads ahead of requests from the opening poster?

To all who are posting on this topic: I suggest we all wait to see if the op comes back and actual reads, then responds to what has been written.

Anything new in the TOU I need to know about?

 

[The Albatross]

Personally I don't see any victim blaming here,

 

[desiderata310]

I could have misread? Someone was saying something like 'you shouldn't have gotten yourself into that situation' or something like that. And I knee jerked. If I'm wrong. I will totally admit it and walk away. Tiny screen anything is possible

 

[RussH]

I just am hoping the op will come back and respond.

 

[The Albatross]

She already did... but you took over for the OP first and our admin "liked" your post.

 

[desiderata310]

Yup she did. Sorry. I missed that.
Still not sure what I'm picking up on with the victim blame stuff but at the point I don't have the brain power to argue nor is it in any way fruitful.
Sorry for any irritation or confusion I might have caused

 

[The Albatross]

Many times over several years this topic comes up where someone drunk/high has been assaulted or raped. Is it assault/rape? Yes, because they don't have the ability to give consent. Heather, though expresses it well I think. Personally I have shared at various times what my own experiences with this scenario were and yeah, I honestly feel like though I was assaulted, I shared responsibility because I made a personally poor decision.

By the responses, not many people share my and shimmerz point of view, but it is a diverse board and that is to be expected. It does not mean that blame/shame/guilt are assigned to a person who makes the decision... assault is still assault because there is no way to give consent under such circumstances. Straight up.

 

[desiderata310]

I hear you. @The Albatross I respect your opinion. I politely disagree. That's all I can do. Thank you for clarifying.
Need to step away from screens and lie down for a bit.

 

[RussH]

She already did... but you took over for the OP first

No I did not take over. The reason for my post is simple; the OP is a guest and not a member. The Op may, or may not have ever come to the forum and replied. I wanted to see if they would reply, they did, and they answered some of the questions.

 

[The Albatross]

So if the rest of us do this it's cool right? Just trying to understand the rules... because so far as I knew them, if the OP has a preference they are the ones (prior to this instance) who express it.

 

[joeylittle]

since when do moderators and/or admin steer the direction of threads ahead of requests from the opening poster?

I didn't see steering - I saw a staff member saying 'hey, maybe the OP will come back and say more things.' Perfectly valid suggestion, when there have been a lot of questions and not many answers.

but you took over for the OP first and our admin "liked" your post.

So? 'Takeover' is in your mind, it's not what happened. Locking the thread until the OP came back would have been takeover.

Anything else, take it to the help desk, please.

 

[joeylittle]

if the rest of us do this it's cool right?

Sure. Nothing was enforced; you're seeing a mountain where there is none. Again: more conversation, help desk (we posted at the same time).