Death Loss of my brother

[BlueWeepingRose]

My body has been shaking and I've been having lots of anxiety since I found out about the death of my older brother. There's times where I've been dissociating and I feel like I'm in a dream state. I feel like this is all a big dream. My older brother committed suicide on the 27th of this month. I'm eating very light because I can't seem to keep any food down due to what happened. I know this is a lot to put on here, but I need to get this out. The reason why he did it was because he was molested by my father when he was younger, along with me. He put on a brave face for years and couldn't handle dealing with the pain any longer. Never once did he reach out for help or speak to anyone, because he didn't want to be a burden on anyone. I went to therapy and I'm slowly healing from all the pain that I've been through. Right now though, this is all so much for me to deal with right now and I'm in a loss for words. I honestly don't know what else to say at this point. I just knew that I had to get this out of my system. If this isn't allowed, please delete it and I'm sorry. ?

 

[Mee]

What a tremendously difficult time, and how brave of you to talk about it.

I am sorry for your loss.

Do you have practical support? Have you scheduled an appointment with your therapist or are they able to offer you a telephone appointment?

 

[BlueWeepingRose]

What a tremendously difficult time, and how brave of you to talk about it.

I am sorry for your loss.

Do you have practical support? Have you scheduled an appointment with your therapist or are they able to offer you a telephone appointment?

I'm asking my mother today to set up an appointment so I can see my therapist again. I just recently stopped since he was talking to me with dealing with panic attacks and skills to do when I'm having a trigger. So yes I'm planning on going again. Thank you for reaching out to me. It means a lot to me. My stomach is achy so much from all of this. It hurts so much from the loss of my brother. :( I'm eating crackers right now and it's helping.

 

[Mee]

Crackers are a good choice. I also find warm water, rather than cold , to be soothing sometimes.

 

[ChildofGod]

I am so sorry to learn that. I am sorry for your loss and that you are not feeling well at all either. I am sorry that that happened to your brother. Gentle and caring thoughts to you and your loved ones, if that is okay with you.

Peppermint tea helps if my stomach is upset. Maybe a piece of toast or some grapes, something light.
Maybe a cup or part of a cup of soup, maybe tomato or something not heavy?