My name is Melissa, I am a 25 year old woman, from Canberra, Australia.
*WARNING*
THE REST OF THE POST IS VERY FULL ON!
I am looking for a bit of support and encouragement, I seem to be really low in mood due to what has happened to me.
It all started when I was 2 years old. I was molested by a random 16 y/o school boy walking home from school. My mu caught him touching me.
The next time it happen was when I was 3, happened by my mums bf on my sisters 15th bday night, he took me upstairs pretending to put me to bed. He not only molested me, he did it with a cut on his thumb i remember feeling really sick and scared and did not know what was happening (my earliest memory).
more happened at the ages of 2,3, 4,5,6,7,8,9,10,13,15,17,18,19,22. As for the first 2 years of my life, I was in hospital a lot, because I was sick with asthma.
I know what you are think where were my parents? but i am putting it in my book.
Well I am going to go public with my story because it is so so diffcult to function and also to get rehabilitation. I tell you something though. I really want to help other survivors, because I know how it feels, I care & I want to help . I am coming forward because I need some sort of closure to help me move on with my life. I am the kind of person that is caring, kind, honest, giving & hard working. I would bend over backwards to help anyone
Well, I am in the process of writing my autobiography even though I am only 25, because I have to let people know now because I suffer inside so so much. People say get over it. That to me is very harsh. They have no idea how it feels to always be the odd one out. Picked last , teased because I am different. It's like so hard to live. I feel like giving in to all. So so so so hard just being alive.
My trauma came throughout in my body, I had chronic pain in the abdominal area and sometime down my legs making if diffiucult to walk and the pain was excruciating, I would also swell (psychologist said to me it was my intestines were inflammed by my trauma coz of the tense feeling, and then all the blood would rush there from various parts of my body to try and heal the inflammed area thats why it swelled, made me look 6 months pregnant. I had swelling and chronic pain condition several times a day for 2 - 3 years. I have been investigated thoughly.
I have not had any children yet.
I hope one day, I can help other people, who have experienced similar things to what I have been through.
I also hope one day I can be a mum, but right now I need to work on me to make me better so I can raise that child with much love and probably overprotectiveness. I know I would never let anyone suffer.
I would rather take away everyones pain and have it even if it is for the rest of my life.
The burden I am carrying aroung on my shoulders was put there by many many people and they never ever took responsibility for their actions.
That is why I am going public to help save other people who suffer so so much. Coping with life has been so difficult.
All's I wanted was someone to love me and take care of me and give me the life i deserved. I was so eager to gain anyone's approval or acceptance, i did everything for them and put myself last.
I am now putting myself first! To learn how to say no, to learn to be stronger, to learn to be more confident, all these things I wanted so badly.
I have so many symptoms because of all the trauma I went through. I am improving though. I go to a personal support person today and also a psychologist, they help me a lot.
Tell me what you think please I am looking for anyone that can sympathise.
*WARNING*
THE REST OF THE POST IS VERY FULL ON!
I am looking for a bit of support and encouragement, I seem to be really low in mood due to what has happened to me.
It all started when I was 2 years old. I was molested by a random 16 y/o school boy walking home from school. My mu caught him touching me.
The next time it happen was when I was 3, happened by my mums bf on my sisters 15th bday night, he took me upstairs pretending to put me to bed. He not only molested me, he did it with a cut on his thumb i remember feeling really sick and scared and did not know what was happening (my earliest memory).
more happened at the ages of 2,3, 4,5,6,7,8,9,10,13,15,17,18,19,22. As for the first 2 years of my life, I was in hospital a lot, because I was sick with asthma.
I know what you are think where were my parents? but i am putting it in my book.
Well I am going to go public with my story because it is so so diffcult to function and also to get rehabilitation. I tell you something though. I really want to help other survivors, because I know how it feels, I care & I want to help . I am coming forward because I need some sort of closure to help me move on with my life. I am the kind of person that is caring, kind, honest, giving & hard working. I would bend over backwards to help anyone
Well, I am in the process of writing my autobiography even though I am only 25, because I have to let people know now because I suffer inside so so much. People say get over it. That to me is very harsh. They have no idea how it feels to always be the odd one out. Picked last , teased because I am different. It's like so hard to live. I feel like giving in to all. So so so so hard just being alive.
My trauma came throughout in my body, I had chronic pain in the abdominal area and sometime down my legs making if diffiucult to walk and the pain was excruciating, I would also swell (psychologist said to me it was my intestines were inflammed by my trauma coz of the tense feeling, and then all the blood would rush there from various parts of my body to try and heal the inflammed area thats why it swelled, made me look 6 months pregnant. I had swelling and chronic pain condition several times a day for 2 - 3 years. I have been investigated thoughly.
I have not had any children yet.
I hope one day, I can help other people, who have experienced similar things to what I have been through.
I also hope one day I can be a mum, but right now I need to work on me to make me better so I can raise that child with much love and probably overprotectiveness. I know I would never let anyone suffer.
I would rather take away everyones pain and have it even if it is for the rest of my life.
The burden I am carrying aroung on my shoulders was put there by many many people and they never ever took responsibility for their actions.
That is why I am going public to help save other people who suffer so so much. Coping with life has been so difficult.
All's I wanted was someone to love me and take care of me and give me the life i deserved. I was so eager to gain anyone's approval or acceptance, i did everything for them and put myself last.
I am now putting myself first! To learn how to say no, to learn to be stronger, to learn to be more confident, all these things I wanted so badly.
I have so many symptoms because of all the trauma I went through. I am improving though. I go to a personal support person today and also a psychologist, they help me a lot.
Tell me what you think please I am looking for anyone that can sympathise.
