It's been a while since I posted here. I took a break to focus on me. The past few months have been very difficult. My husband still has not made any contact with me. It's been 5 months. I attempted to contact him in early Dec. I did it thru Facebook so I could see if he read it. The message was very generic and didn't mention the divorce or anything. As expected, he ignored me so I blocked him. Hurts like hell to be rejected like this after 17yrs of marriage.
He is supposed to return from Afghanistan sometime next week. Our daughter is upset that she doesn't know when because she really wants to be there. He finally sent her a Facebook message saying the internet has been down for about a month. His last chat with her was Dec 21. I find it hard to believe that the internet has been down because his "girlfriend" (I have other more fitting words I use but they are not appropriate here) has made several posts on her Facebook page. When they talked on Dec 21 he asked specifically if I was ok. Why does he care if I am ok? If I'm not it's because of him.
We now have a court order for child support and spousal maintenance. During one of his chats with our daughter he told her that he planned to find a place to live as soon as possible because "I" am not letting him take her until he has an address. I have the girlfriend's address so I will fight if he lists that as his address. He told her it would be hard to find a place because I am taking most of his check. His words were "your mom is really being an ass about all this". She asked him what else I was taking from him. He said "nothing, your mom is doing what she has to do. I'm not mad. I wish I could do more for her I guess". What?!? He's talking out of both sides of his mouth. I don't think he has a clue what he is doing.
I have been reading about midlife crisis and believe that it has something to do with all of this. I am hoping that he will get counseling after he gets back. He has to take a mental evaluation and if he is completely honest I don't see how it wouldn't alert someone to refer him for help.
I am apprehensive about his return because I do not want the divorce to become final. I am trying to figure out the best way to handle exposing the affair. Hopefully, one of them will screw up and it will come out that way. Our daughter is old enough to know that her dad left me to be with another woman who has 2 children.
With or without him I will be ok. I truly believe that. I am doing my best to stay positive. I don't want to keep telling myself that he will proceed with the divorce as soon as he gets back. I hope that our daughter will have some influence on his decision. I am not being unrealistic. I am continuing to move forward with my life. I am becoming stronger everyday and plan to continue working on me. It feels good finding myself again. :)
He is supposed to return from Afghanistan sometime next week. Our daughter is upset that she doesn't know when because she really wants to be there. He finally sent her a Facebook message saying the internet has been down for about a month. His last chat with her was Dec 21. I find it hard to believe that the internet has been down because his "girlfriend" (I have other more fitting words I use but they are not appropriate here) has made several posts on her Facebook page. When they talked on Dec 21 he asked specifically if I was ok. Why does he care if I am ok? If I'm not it's because of him.
We now have a court order for child support and spousal maintenance. During one of his chats with our daughter he told her that he planned to find a place to live as soon as possible because "I" am not letting him take her until he has an address. I have the girlfriend's address so I will fight if he lists that as his address. He told her it would be hard to find a place because I am taking most of his check. His words were "your mom is really being an ass about all this". She asked him what else I was taking from him. He said "nothing, your mom is doing what she has to do. I'm not mad. I wish I could do more for her I guess". What?!? He's talking out of both sides of his mouth. I don't think he has a clue what he is doing.
I have been reading about midlife crisis and believe that it has something to do with all of this. I am hoping that he will get counseling after he gets back. He has to take a mental evaluation and if he is completely honest I don't see how it wouldn't alert someone to refer him for help.
I am apprehensive about his return because I do not want the divorce to become final. I am trying to figure out the best way to handle exposing the affair. Hopefully, one of them will screw up and it will come out that way. Our daughter is old enough to know that her dad left me to be with another woman who has 2 children.
With or without him I will be ok. I truly believe that. I am doing my best to stay positive. I don't want to keep telling myself that he will proceed with the divorce as soon as he gets back. I hope that our daughter will have some influence on his decision. I am not being unrealistic. I am continuing to move forward with my life. I am becoming stronger everyday and plan to continue working on me. It feels good finding myself again. :)
