Hi Guys I'm new here so a big hello to everyone. I suffer from complex PTSD and the past 6 months it has been really bad. I'm constantly angry at my boyfriend but for no good reason, I can't work out what my triggers are except I can't handle not knowing plans for the day. But my anger has gotten really bad I went to see a psych today, but I ended up talking about early childhood sexual abuse and walked out feeling worse than I have in a long time. I spent most of the afternoon crying in bed and when my partner got home I lashed out at him for getting work (whnen I told him to get a job) because I have two exams thursday, a job interview tomorrow and Ineede him today when I was hurting, so I pushed him for the first time in the two years we've been together...I'm scared he can't take much more of me, well he loves me, but the other me that comes with the complex PTSD.....
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My Complex Ptsd Is Effecting My Relationship
- Post starter Annabelle
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Lucycat
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Maybe this post is in the wrong place. You are not a supporter right? - and neither am I. If I am right you can hit the 'report' button and ask for it to be moved to somewhere appropriate..
Anyway I too have CPTSD and understand how nasty we can be to our partners. They do get a raw deal. But you said you sw a psych - I don't know if you mean psychologist, but if so that is a good start. I have been in therapy for nearly six years now since my CPTSD was diagnosed. It really does help and now I am much more able to recognise triggers and avoid them or deal with the consequences more quickly. I have told my husband to leave me many times - suggesting he would have a far happier life without me in it. But he has stuck by me through thick and thin. We have been together for over 30 years. My CPTSD is also as a consequence of childhood sexual abuse. You really do need to process those memories before you can move forwards. It is normal to feel worse after therapy in the begining, but it does get better and easier.
Anyway I too have CPTSD and understand how nasty we can be to our partners. They do get a raw deal. But you said you sw a psych - I don't know if you mean psychologist, but if so that is a good start. I have been in therapy for nearly six years now since my CPTSD was diagnosed. It really does help and now I am much more able to recognise triggers and avoid them or deal with the consequences more quickly. I have told my husband to leave me many times - suggesting he would have a far happier life without me in it. But he has stuck by me through thick and thin. We have been together for over 30 years. My CPTSD is also as a consequence of childhood sexual abuse. You really do need to process those memories before you can move forwards. It is normal to feel worse after therapy in the begining, but it does get better and easier.
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Your right I'm in the wrong place...I'm finding the site a little confusing where can I go to join a thread and thank you for you reply yes i meant Psychologist :)
Lucycat
Sponsor
You will soon find your way around. Don't worry.
https://www.myptsd.com/forums/ptsd-relationships.21/
If you click on the above link it will take you to loads of PTSD relationship threads that you can add to or create your own.
https://www.myptsd.com/forums/ptsd-relationships.21/
If you click on the above link it will take you to loads of PTSD relationship threads that you can add to or create your own.
Livy's Mom
Silver Member
Hello @Annabelle. I am a supporter so I am ill equipped to offer you any advice on your struggle with PTSD but I can tell you that being in a relationship with someone who suffers from PTSD from my own experience all I ever need from my partner is acknowledgment of the situation.
I don't need him to get down deep into the weeds of why he's feeling the way he does or treating me the way he is. I already know why. What I need is acknowledgment that he is aware and it is no reflection on me as a person or our relationship as a whole.
I don't expect him to just stop upon acknowledgment. That isn't really possible. If it were possible it's unlikely there would be a thread dedicated to these relationships.
It doesn't even matter to me how long into a particular situation he is able to squeak out the awareness. As long as it comes. It could come in the form of one word for all I care.
I'm sure your partners feelings are the last thing on your mind when you are at the lowest of lows but it can go a long way in preventing hurt and anger in your relationship.
I don't need him to get down deep into the weeds of why he's feeling the way he does or treating me the way he is. I already know why. What I need is acknowledgment that he is aware and it is no reflection on me as a person or our relationship as a whole.
I don't expect him to just stop upon acknowledgment. That isn't really possible. If it were possible it's unlikely there would be a thread dedicated to these relationships.
It doesn't even matter to me how long into a particular situation he is able to squeak out the awareness. As long as it comes. It could come in the form of one word for all I care.
I'm sure your partners feelings are the last thing on your mind when you are at the lowest of lows but it can go a long way in preventing hurt and anger in your relationship.
Purplemunchkin
Gold Member
Welcome @Annabelle!
Another supporter chipping in here.
You will see it said all over these boards, but communication is key. We love you, and want to do our best for you, but generally we aren't psychic. So when you are able to we need you to talk to us about what is going on. We don't need to know all about your traumas, just share your feelings when you can and let us know how we can help - even if that means giving you space.
Good luck, and take care of yourself.
Another supporter chipping in here.
You will see it said all over these boards, but communication is key. We love you, and want to do our best for you, but generally we aren't psychic. So when you are able to we need you to talk to us about what is going on. We don't need to know all about your traumas, just share your feelings when you can and let us know how we can help - even if that means giving you space.
Again, if you can talk to your partner, he may have some insight into this.
Good luck, and take care of yourself.
- Post starter
- #7
Thankyou every one for your advice and support. I was in the midst of starting an introduction to myself and my life experiences that have lead me to where I am today (on the correct forum!) but half way through the session timed out and closed, for some reason? I found a helpful article last night on how to work with my partner for my complex PTSD, we read it together and it helped him understand what's happening...and also that I need to set boundaries as much as he does. Our house is small so it's hard to go somewhere for a while to calm down re-wire my brain and think about the situation. I plan on finding the introduction forum where I will start to shre my story. Thank you again
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