Need to unscramble

[Dynamic]

I’m mad about wb am I mad at him? Maybe

Going for a walk

Why am I mad? I told my therapist about him causing me some stress.

 

[Dynamic]

Annoying myself but calm and I exercised too much yesterday but the benefits are still here I feel grounded

I feel lots of pain tho

I don’t like my therapists questions at all. I want to just have my old T back but it’s not possible


She’s annoying me with these questions!

I feel like we will never get anywhere just a feeling

 

[OM_™]

If you and your T are not simpatico, it's OK to get a new one that is...just saying

 

[Dynamic]

I don’t think it’s that I think it’s me

:( like just so uncomfortable complaining or venting a lot

I want her to be my old T and she’s not

It’s too early to tell if she is not gonna work but so far she asks me good questions for therapy bad for my feelings

My medicine will increase again in a couple weeks so this will all hopefully settle down

 

[Dynamic]

New t and I have been talking about the drs a lot. She’s gonna help me stay organized and focused on me so I don’t avoid myself to death

No exaggeration.

 

[Dynamic]

Listening to audio adrenaline leaving 99

Crying

Wb wanted to FaceTime I barely ever do that even w sister in Egypt I don’t like pics of myself either but I sent pics of my hair (I tinted it)

SMH i told one of my best friends I am mad at myself but you guys have heard that or maybe seen me say that a lot lol

It’s all good

Therapy has been helpful. We just started talking about wb but he can’t be my focus today. Im gonna stretch and this is my reminder this feeling is temporary. About what we’re doing today.

 

[SeekingAfrica]

Personally I have noticed that if I just push down how I feel it makes it worse.

I tried to conform to how I should be for several weeks now and pushed every feeling I had about it... and now all of a sudden I could no longer control what I needed and had to have a talk with my mother about boundaries and having some compromises between their ways and my way. Because I tried to stuff my feelings and do what they want to be agreeable and it just did not work. So I spoke up, but after weeks of avoidance it was exhausting to have to talk for hours to be understood about something that should make sense with one sentence. It's bad.

So I know that pushing how you feel never works.

Also, sometimes you can't do what you need even if you want.

I am really sorry that you're struggling.

I read the first post and few after, but not all, so stopping by just to send some support.

I know life can be frustrating and impossibly hard.

I don't know all the answers but I have faith in you.

It's okay to pivot and make different decisions if something isn't working.

It's okay if you aren't sure the right way to handle things.

It's okay if you need some alone time.

You'll untangle what is wrong, but you may need time, or help, or many things at the same time.

You can do this, I promise. Purge all your worries on paper or computer or something. Then figure out just the next 3 steps, or even the next one step. What do you really need to do right now? What can you get closest to that? What is the first step towards that?

Stay strong! Will stop by the thread again, let us know how you're doing!

You can do this, I promise! Sending many many hugs.

 

[Dynamic]

my therapist is helping, I guess I been totalllllllllly avoiding my main dr.

t and I discussed the eating disorder and I just got done explaining it w details. after this work on my laptop I will eat

im irritable

thank you @SeekingAfrica

sometimes you can't do what you need even if you want.

yes this

, so stopping by just to send some support.

thank you! <3

It's okay to pivot and make different decisions if something isn't working.

I love this

Im resting too but I like your advice for figuring nxt 1-3 steps

praying you'll be blessed <3

 

[Dynamic]

You can do this, I promise. Purge all your worries on paper or computer or something. Then figure out just the next 3 steps, or even the next one step. What do you really need to do right now? What can you get closest to that? What is the first step towards that?

Thanks again for the long msg.

I basically need to rest and get a hundred things done :

I’m feeling weird/bad/sick/pain but doing well

So I guess good ol rest and get stuff done alternating

Right now rest on the recliner. I was cursing a lot this morning idk :/

 

[Dynamic]

Found out someone ignorant said the words “her seizures are bullshit”



Makes me want to kill myself but I’m actively against that0”

I feel like some people are only happy when happy people cry

 

[Dynamic]

I know I didn’t have to but I printed documents about Pnes and conversion disorder including symptoms k deal w everyday and put it in their mailbox with a note that could have been more nasty and also maybe more nice.

Sincerely a warning not to mess with me though

I asked my mom this morning what the f is wrong w everyone but I was just so overwhelmed

This is literally just more of life and I need to keep it together

 

[SeekingAfrica]

Found out someone ignorant said the words “her seizures are bullshit”

But you are right though. There are millions of ignorant people and some are inevitably going to be around you.

If you know in yourself that they are just ignorant let it go or rather let them go.

And maybe they'll never recognize certain things. They probably Don't realize the impact of their words even. It's okay. As long as the people that matter do.