Physical Pain

[goingonhope]

Anyone else in physical pain tonight?

I am and when the pain gets this rough and I feel like need to vomit, my brains often shut-down and I generally don't know how to think to help myself. I'm better prepared tonight then ever before to get through this without it being triggering and leading to Ptsd symptoms, as well as, those related feelings, predominantly helplessness and hopelessness. Even though this sucks! In addition to my regular valproic acid for neuropathic pain too, I took a small dose of a prescribed benzo. for panic.

A lot lately, I've been recalling lots of serious neglect.

One of the worst feelings is suffering and being in so much pain and having parents ignore you and your any request for helping to find relief; Get angry with you and curse you; Guilt trip and/or despise you for your pain; Not believe you and make false conjectures and blame you;

Or, not particularly care; And quite painful too, is to not offer any suggestions - rather offer an indifferent I don't know, or their generalized fears, catastrophic thinking or personal feelings of powerlessness while focusing on the exclusive encouragement of your emotional support towards them.

 

[InHell11]

That happens to me quite a lot, then sometimes I still try to keep doing whatever it was I was doing and will try so hard to get it done, even when I can feel the physical burn out feeling starting. So then I think to myself 'I better hurry with this so I can get done before the last of my energy is gone.' I do try to make sure I don't overdo things and cause myself too much stress, but at the same time I'm 23 and its frustrating if even a simple task ends up turning into a seemingly endless life force sucking project....so sometimes I try to just push though it and then when I feel like crap I wonder 'why the hell did I go and do that again.'

It's even worse when its something I really want to do like go to a concert, I've had to miss a couple because I was feeling to exuasted and anxious.

 

[goingonhope]

Can I ever relate to, too often doing, or trying very hard at the very least, to push through what it is...and force myself through and in spite of increasing pain and suffering.

:wtf: I just did this very thing once again.

 

[shoulderblades]

Huh, it's interesting you describe feeling cold. I can get very cold when feeling anxious or "off", even if it's a warm day. I never considered connecting the two, I guess because it doesn't always happen. I also have a thyroid disease and one of the symptoms of thyroiditis is inability to regulate body temperature, so I always put it down to that. But maybe there is a connection between my anxiety and feeling cold? Ugh, it's so hard to tell. My doctor always insists that's thyroiditis, but I always have a gut feeling that there's something more going on.

I tend to get very bad leg cramps. I have lymphedema in both my legs, so I can get cramps from that particularly when my legs and feet are puffy and swollen, but I get cramps even when the lymphedema isn't bad and I have minimal swelling. They're especially bad when I feel anxious. Recently, I've been experiencing cramps so bad in my legs that I almost fall over, can't hold myself up, can't bent over and can't squat without my legs sharply giving way, and it really hurts when they give way.

But again, I don't always experience these cramps. I might experience trembling, particularly in my hands, arms and legs (like I am today) instead of cramps. Also back pain. I know I carry a lot of my tension and stress and anxiety in my back. I hunch a lot or hold my shoulders really stiff and taut, and don't realise I'm doing it.

I never put two-and-two together that perhaps what I experience is somatic to my anxiety and trauma until very recently. I'm hesitant to tell my doctor or anyone professional because I have a feeling they won't believe me. Or they'll attribute it to something else, or will dismiss it as part of the medical conditions I already have. Bleh.

 

[shoulderblades]

Something I forgot to mention: I find what helps is a really hot bath with deep heat or tiger balm mixed into the water. The heat of the water lets the deep heat sink deep into my skin. It's very relaxing. Helps take away focus of pain in my back or cramps in my legs, also helps me sleep pretty soundly.

 

[embarr]

I'm in pain right now. My left shoulder is hard as a rock! It hurts so bad. I have started to see a physical therapist and he gave me some moist heating pads that you put in the microwave and a book on neck pain. I've tried to do some of the exercises and used aleve. Used the over the counter patches. And it's still hurting. Probably will have to go get some muscle relaxers. I get joint pain and cold feet as well.

 

[Changing4Best]

I have had Lyme Disease since 1985, so I get many pains from that. I know when my mother died, I was freezing so badly that I was shaking with the cold. My hands hurt so badly! She and I were close, very close and losing her was one of the worst things that ever happened to me. She was 86, so it was not an untimely death or anything, but it just hurt me in EVERY way.

But in general, Lyme Disease has all kinds of symptoms, (over 200 of them) a lot of pain and I also seem to be developeing some other problem that might either be vascular or sciatic nerve pain, going to see the doctor in a couple weeks. I'm dreading the news, whatever it will be. Lyme Disease is BAD, but this all makes it worse! I feel like I'm being punished, but for what!?!

And to top that all off, I have a lump in my breast. More mammograms will be needed before they decide upon surgery or not. No biopsy taken yet.

I feel like I'm a MESS!!!