Please help me process - BFF with PTSD is starting meds

[Friday]

This friend absolutely just flipped out on me

Even said

“You’re ruining my life”

okay so distance myself got it

The “Lashing Out” vs “Truth” thing, is one of the most difficult aspects of being a supporter, for me. As with very little exception (toddlers & teens, for the most part) I don’t tolerate venom being spewed at me.

- Last night parted with smiles/laughter/hugs.
- This morning started with grins and excitement.
- Split second later? “I’m only nice to you when I’m pretending! I have to fake being nice to you!”

Not a lot of ways to misinterpret that?

One possibility (that doesn’t mean they hate me), of course, is the whole treating people nicely when you’re in pain? CAN take a helluva lotta effort. But to me? That’s not faking it, or pretending. Maybe it is to them. Maybe I’m just the designated asshole, atm. Maybe they do hate me.

NOT gonna attempt to have a discussion about that with them. Not anytime soon, anyway.

Ditto, distancing now, got it.

Imma go make some sushi & take a cool shower & curl up with a book in the shade. You?

 

[Dynamic]

@Friday thanks Friday I’m in bed with f all attitude and peace. as I calm down I do see more clearly they’re clearly out of it. Sigh. Exhausting!

 

[Dynamic]

Just venting it helps. interaction is nice if someone has something to say

I remember they said “I don’t even like having you as a friend anyway”

Like okay. Do. Not. Pick. Up. Your. Phone. To. Contact. Me.

That’s it.

 

[Dynamic]

Now this friend is MIA. I’ve read other supporter threads. This is wild. I’ve cried and have a feeling they’re gonna hit me up as soon as I no longer wonder if they are okay. I called two hospitals. The second asked

“Okay do you know why they were in here?”
I said psychiatric

She said - because of that I can’t tell you anything and you have to wait for them to call you from wherever they got transferred to.

Idk if that was specific about my friend or if that’s just regular.

I’m exhausted

 

[Dynamic]

This person is draining me. I can’t take it. A part of me wants to text them right now:

But they already texted: ttyl and goodnight

When is the right time to say “hey I don’t wanna watch you mess up anymore do you need more help?”

That’s not it.

Seems like there’s nothing I can say. I can only change my interactions and hope for the best :/

It hurts and sucks

 

[Dynamic]

Ah good thread thanks for all the previous help

Now I am still in a bit of a push and pull w them and they said they’ll likely continue unfortunately because what they are going thru is hell.

But they still need me. Just posting to get it off my chest and tell myself it’s okay to be upset and not talk to them about it right now
What they are going thru is worse

And it’s also okay I did say something at one point because I needed that to continue the friendship.