Rough Day Thread...

[PreciousChild]

@PreciousChild that's an interesting question. I dont think I've done that to my supporters (OK really hoping I haven't!! Now I need to ask them!). I know I get bitchy but it's more frustrations about what's going on in my head than a need to pass around shame. For me isolating is about quieting the screaming in my head ....which I can't do it people are trying to interact with me. So yes...I'll drive them away but I don't think I want them to feel as ashamed of themselves as I do about me.

It may not even be intentional. I'll admit that being shame-based has made me shame-dumping too. At the time though, I would have told you that I acted out because I was hurt and mad, and I had to yell back or save my child from embarrassment by calling out certain behaviors. But now I would say that I was outsourcing the shame I had inside me that made me interpret someone's behavior as shaming me or my child when that wasn't even the only way to interpret events.

 

[Pippi427]

Yep..just being sarcastic....
It makes me sad to add getting him a job to all the things @Pippi427 has done for him .....just to have him turn around and be such an ass to her.

The man never asked me for a dime. But I said I'd support him and boy did I ever. I cared for him when he was sick and helped him find piecework til his new job was landed. I'll never understand what I did wrong.

 

[Sweetpea76]

You didn't do anything wrong @Pippi427. That's the rub.

Don't fall into the trap of blaming yourself for another person's behavior or mental health. He's responsible for himself

 

[EveHarrington]

Why am I being slammed for asking if something is sarcastic?

It was a serious question. I thought we were supposed to ask for clarification when we didn’t understand.

My last reply stands as if it was serious, then people should NOT be advocating that someone quit their job when in an episode.

Please stop singling me out because you don’t like me or I said something you don’t like in the past.

 

[Freida]

What @Sweetpea76 said - this is on him - not you.
You may never know his reasoning -- but whatever it is you are not to blame.

 

[Pippi427]

Update on this issue. He contacted my best friend, whom he also has met and has contact information for already.

He's extremely stressed and embarrassed about his situation. Details are forthcoming...but it was indeed...."not me"

 

[Pippi427]

So I’m still waiting for him to contact me which he says he’s going to do. My best friend says that she thinks he just wants to be friends now because he can’t handle an emotional component of a relationship right now.

A lot of it has to do with starting his new job where he has to deal with really horrible shit on a daily basis. I felt this was coming. It remains to be seen what kind of relationship we have moving forward if any.