idk what it is..just when I was younger I would get In trouble if I was too fat or too skinny....beaten....and it was every day..though no one can b fat one day skinny the next.i was also sexually abused for years 3 times a day...I felt no control over my body what so ever,,,
You keep repeating this bit.
Which means you know WHY you feel this way.
The same way I know WHY I feel that cars parked on the side of the road = an ambush.
How likely is it that 3 cars parked along side the road in the US = an armed assault? I’m sure it’s happened, at least once, in all the gangland nonsense... but is it a common thing? Do cars blow up and men with automatic weapons surround your vehicle and drag you out (or shoot through your door)? Is it in the news every day?(or worse, so common that it doesn’t need to be in the news, just the list of disappeared). It’s super common where I used to live/work. Often an everyday thing, although they tended to come in waves. Every day in scattered places for a few days/week, quiet, every day again. Quiet again. Which made the threat omnipresent. I have a very real, and very legitimate reason for all of my alarm bells going off when there are cars left on the side of the road.
Serious question. Can you tell me, in this country, how likely it is that a car parked on the side of the road is loaded with explosives or about to be driven/pushed across the road, creating a roadblock?
Now what if I respond d to that answer by telling you about kidnap & ransom in Latin America? Okaaaaaaay. But this is Kansas. Not Latin America.
And I repeat, again, WHY I’m afraid of cars.
And you repeat, again, that this is Kansas. No one does that in Kansas.
But they do it in Latin America.
Kansas. We’re in KANSAS.
You see this infinite loop?
As long as I’m stuck on
why my fear exists, instead of moving past my fear, we’re not in Kansas anymore. We’re in my head. Which isn’t real. It was real, somewhere else. But not now. I’m the only one making it real, by insisting that what was true somewhere else, in another time and place, is what’s real now. It’s not. Just because the same fear spikes, doesn’t mean it’s a legitimate fear, anymore. I know WHY I’m afraid. It was real, before. But it’s not real now. Because we’re in Kansas.
Knowing why? Is only as important as it helps us deal with the world that is, and not the world that was. It can be a hugely important step, but only if we don’t get stuck in it. Because that’s an infinite loop. You know why. Time to move onto HOW. Which means challenging your thinking.
