T Trying To Transfer Me... Panic Attack

[Reds]

I just had a phone session with my t, and it sounded like she was trying to transfer me to another t. I just stopped talking and hung up the phone.

It feels like I am having a panic attack. I am in tears and shaking, I wish I had someone near but I am all on my own. She is busy calling but I can't take her call, she has left a voice message but I am not ready to listen to it.:cry::banghead:

I can't take this, why would she want to transfer me? I know phone therapy is not the best but I am ok with it. I don't want to talk to anyone else.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Did she talk to you about why or do have any ideas about the reason?

 

[digger]

why would she want to transfer me? I know phone therapy is not the best but I am ok with it. I don't want to talk to anyone else.

I know it's not what you want, but I think realistically this was always going to happen at some point when you moved. You may think phone therapy is working for you, but perhaps she doesn't. Perhaps she doesn't feel that she is helping you enough that way and that you need more support than she can give now.

Trust in her to know that she is doing what she thinks is in your best interest. I think it's great that she's taken the time to stick with you after you moved for a while to help you with that transition and that she's now helping you with the next step. Finding a therapist that can help you where you live now.

 

[TimeToHeal]

You should give her a chance to finish what she was saying....perhaps she isn't trying to transfer you at all. Or if she does suggest it, try to hear her out....it could be that another person would be in addition to your phone sessions with her.

I can completely empathize with your feelings of panic though. I have had many therapists "hand me off" to someone else and it was difficult and triggered my feelings/fears of abandonment. In fact, the last time it happened I took a 5 year "break" from therapy. Not my best idea, but I have finally found a fantastic trauma therapist so I guess it worked out alright, finally.

Please take her call and hear what she has to say. And also tell her what you're feeling and how it is affecting you.... I'm sure she'll be helpful and understanding. :)

 

[mytai]

@Reds, you said it sounded like she was trying to transfer you. You didn't say she was transferring you. I can see how it would be upsetting to think that she might transfer you, but how do you know for sure? If she didn't come right out and say that was her intention then you don't know. I went through this with my T, I felt like she was trying to pawn me off on someone else, turns out that it was my fear colouring the situation (fear of being abandoned by someone I connected with) when in reality my T was trying to find out if I felt like she was helping me. She had my best interests at heart, and she couldn't tell if she was helping me or not - she wanted to keep me on as a client if I felt she was helping, but wanted to refer me if I felt like she wasn't of help.

You won't know until you answer your T's phone calls or listen to that message what her intentions were. If that doesn't answer the question whether or not she is trying to transfer you, then you should ask her if that's what she is doing, because that is what it feels like.

Not being judgemental, just telling you my experience and my observation in this case.

 

[Reds]

@Ayesha, we were talking about something that I am currently experiencing and she I think she felt like she was not getting it. So she asked if I would want to talk to someone else, I said I don't like talking to people. The she said it would help if I talked to someone who'd understand what I am experiencing.

Well I have been feeling like she doesn't want to talk to me for sometime now. Last week we discussed it and and she assured me that she stilla wants to work with me.

@digger1 I am honestly not ready for a new t. I love my current t and I think we work well together. She has helped me through a lot and I am just not ready to let go.

I have listened to the voicemail and she doesn't know why I hung up. I have sent her an email, I also apologised for dropping the phone. I just feel miserable. I have no one here and she is the only thing that still makes sense in my life right now. I know she is just my t but I also love her so much and would not want to lose the relationship

 

[scout86]

There's a big difference between saying, "Do you want to talk to someone else?" and, "I'm going to quit talking to you, you need to talk to someone else."

So, "What everyone else said."

You can't have too many good people in your life and there are more good people out there, beyond your T, really there are. We need to learn how to find them and how to connect with them and how to do it in ways that are "safe" and reasonable. That's part of the process, I think.

 

[Jane.l]

Don't panic Reds - scout is right it's a different thing just to ask if you think talking to someone else might help - I don't think that sounds like she wants to transfer you more she maybe concerned that she isn't able to support you fully on the phone and is giving you the option that's a good thing .

My T has abandoned me or as good as and I actually feel strangely numb hope I keep feeling numb . I think yours is just looking out for you .

 

[ms spock]

Reds be kind to yourself. Could you talk to yourself if you can't talk to other people? Reassure yourself on a regular basis.