General The Good Stress Causes Issues Too.

[amethist]

It's true the good stressor's does cause issues too, as we found out big time this weekend.

Hubby had been looking forward to having our grandson to stay for ages. We dont have either of them as often as we should be able to, so make the most of the time when we can.

This weekend is was Harry's turn to stay over with us. only one night was planned, but 2 were a possibility.

I collected him on Friday afternoon and back we came for tea, and plans for Saturday were set up. :rolleyes: Mmm but the weather blew most of them away.

Saturday morning Harry and I were going to see the trains, then walk down to the canal and feed the duck. back for lunch then Harry and granddad were going to put there overalls on and go mess in the shed, sorry "Bike Garage" , its a big shed :roflmao:.

Well we saw the trains and then it started raining before we got to the canal, so we came home earlier than I really wanted to for lunch.

The rain put a stop to them going out and this put a downer on both of them. harry was bored and fed up, hubby was stressed because he had planned this and now it was halted because of the rain.

By this time though he had told Harry he could stay for another night, but a 5 year old who is bored is not an easy one to manage. so I had to fish out a sticker book, and find stuff on the TV for them both to watch.

We did manage to get through the rest of Saturday, but hubby was going down hill by now.

Hubby had a rough night, so Sunday morning was a nightmare. We had planned on taking him home before lunch in our car, then going on to a garden center for some bits for me.

Well that all changed.

By 9.30 am i was ringing my other daughter to take him home, (No public transport to get him home until noon).

Hubby was put to bed, grandson taken home, and me left shattered.

Harry had enjoyed himself, and hubby had done his best to play and explain to him why he was ill and tired.


Best thing is we do it all again next weekend with our granddaughter, but at least I can take her shopping for a fairy dress. Sunday morning we can make buns for her to take home.

 

[Tinyflame]

I'm sorry amethist it sounded like you were hoping (naturally) for smoother expectations.

I am so sick of stress- good stress, bad stress, stress I think I cause others (and likely do). :(
xox, (((Hugs)))

 

[Tifanee]

I think children create good stress which can make the best of us frazzled with snacks, naps, tv time, play time, entertainment, snuggles, and clean ups. I'm worn out after a weekend with my five-year old, but I can deal. With my love, he also goes into a little melt-down of his own after our own big weekend. At the end of the day, he also needs his own nap and quiet time.

Best of luck next weekend! It might help to have sunny day and rainy day plans, just in case. Sunny day adventures can be your 2 night sleepovers and rainy day adventures can be your 1 night sleepovers.

 

[Beverly G.]

Well that weekend sounded fun.:D I'm sure next weekend will be better as girls are easier for the ladies to manage. I have 4 girls and 1 son and I was always at a loss as to how to keep him busy. I can sit all day and play wth barbies with my little girls however. Best of luck and bully for you for even trying.

 

[amethist]

It was actually fun for the most part Beverly, just a shame the weather and PTSD spoilt what would have been a great weekend.

He may only be 5 years old, but our grandson know's granddad is not well and things sometimes have to change.

He never stopped chattering when he got home, all about what he had done, not what he could not do.

So at least he was happy.

 

[Pale Warrior]

Oh Amethist, there have to be attempts to "normalise" life, if only to test the water and see how far things have come and where the tensions remain. By the sound of things it was well worth while for everyone and the weather had the final say.

We have to keep trying, pushing the envelope, or stagnation will draw the dreaded depression to our door.

We just had our first PTSD free weekend in .... 11 years and I hardly dare discuss it with him for fear of jinxing it (I know, I know, dumb or what?). But I know we were on a knife edge, something insignificant to anyone else could have been the trigger and put us back to square one.

And yes, 5 year olds are exhausting :)

 

[ISupportHer]

This is one of those situations Pearl, that I feel I know exactly what you mean. We had both grandsons overnight Saturday. The first night away for the youngest, less than 1.

Doesn't take much to see how it affects my wife. She is doing much better but I could tell it was really stressful some of the time.

But there was good too. I notice the little things. She put the youngest to bed. The whole thing. Bottle, rocked him, stayed with him until he was asleep. He is the 4th grandchild, 3rd since the PTSD stuff reared it's head. I can't recall her doing that with any of the other kids. Always has been me.

There were other things that were not so good, but I will refer back to the other cup analogy. That the cup is half full, not half empty. But good stress definitely adds to what is in the cup. No doubt about it.

 

[Nicolette]

It is on this basis of 'good stress' that I planned our wedding.... one thing a week only; I took on most of the responsibility; not too many people around at once except for the wedding; a few days break before the honeymoon.

I so get what you are all saying.

Friends came down with their 3 girls and stayed two nights. 5 extra people in the house with a show to go to in the city and Anthony was out for the following week. It makes you ponder is it all worth it but then you have to figure they need good times too even if they do knock them over.

 

[Eleanor]

Grandparents are visting here. Left my L (who is five!) with grandma and grandpa while I took the dog to the vet (an hour away) visited with the vet (who is a friend) for a bit - I was the last appointment. So I was away for about three hours. Got home, and Grandpa went off to take a nap!

5 year olds are just tiring.

I'm glad you had a nice time, and hope you H recovers quickly. I think your grandson sets a good example - focus on the good. You didn't do what you couldn't. So what? You had a good time doing what you did.

 

[amethist]

Hubby recovered well in the end Eleanor.

Doing it all again this weekend with our granddaughter who is nearly 7, so a lot easier.

Wont be long before we will be doing all this 3 weekends every time as my daughter is having her 3rd around the end of August.

 

[amethist]

OK so now it is 7 hours since my post above and hubby has crashed.

Granddaughter is asleep and just put hubby to bed with strong sedative oil blend on.

Just got until tomorrow lunch time to get to. No probs the Ninja can manage that.