Therapy writing assignment -help

[Snowflake]

My therapist wants me to pick an incident from childhood that still has an emotional charge and write from the younger self-what happened and how she felt -I’m to show it and capture it as if it’s a movie. Visual details etc of what happened.

She wants to do EMDR on it.

I’m struggling!! Part of me thinks how can a child remember such details??? Is she trying to catch me in a lie? Any thoughts ??

 

[Friday]

I’m struggling!! Part of me thinks how can a child remember such details??? Is she trying to catch me in a lie? Any thoughts ??

I have episodic memories down to about age 2, which is common in my cohort group (kids who moved a lot in their early years, rather than kids whose lives were basically the same until they started school at age 5). Adult recall of their childhood is extremely variable. Some remember in exquisite detail, although their perspective is still that of a child (meaning that what children remember isn’t always exactly what happened, because they either didn’t have the capacity to understand what was happening, or their parents went to great effort to keep them from having adult problems in their lives.). Others have mostly vague amorphous memories with some sharp ones. Some can’t remember more than bits and pieces. Others don’t remember their childhood at all. What you remember? Is what you remember. At whatever level of detail you do. Which can ALSO change with time. Often what was a vague memory can be jogged to near total recall, meanwhile what started out as a very distinct memory can fade and become indistinct. Neither indicates lying. Memory is a very fluid creature.

My therapist wants me to pick an incident from childhood that still has an emotional charge and write from the younger self-what happened and how she felt -I’m to show it and capture it as if it’s a movie. Visual details etc of what happened

If you’re having problems doing it on your own / as homework? Do it in session.

 

[grit]

In order for the therapist to catch a lie of your childhood, she would have to be there to witness back in the day or have other corroboration from other people. It is your story and if you tell it different each time, it shows more how you are healing and relating to the same story not what you do or do not remember.

If anything, it may help her know more or less how far you are healing this part of your life. Also I would recommend you focus on the feelings coming out of your body. those are what you need healing more, not the colour of the curtain unless that has other meaning for you.

 

[Wendell_R]

I perceive that what holds me back isn't necessarily what happened to me as much as it is the memory of that trauma. I know with certainty that I was neglected, physically abused, and around too much sexuality. But I don't have memories of particular events. What I do have is my young self's sense of what happened, how I have kept a bunch of feelings inside about what happened. So if I look at it as capturing how my young self feels about past events, then it doesn't matter if my account is a distortion of what happened. It becomes an accurate account of how I remember & feel what happened. And from the therapeutic point of view, that's what has been really healing for me.

 

[EveHarrington]

No, your therapist isn’t trying to catch you in a lie.

 

[whiteraven]

Why would she want to catch you in a lie? I mean, sincerely, is there a reason you think she would do this?

My younger insiders have exquisite memories for the stuff that happened. They hold them, for me, until I am ready to deal with them.

 

[Justmehere]

Write what you remember. If you don’t remember it like a movie, describe the snapshot. If you only remember a few details or emotions, write that. When I did EMDR, we used just the first detail I remembered.

 

[Skywatcher]

I don’t understand why she wants to do this writing assignment. In emdr, the therapist doesn’t need much in event or detail.

 

[lux.]

I don’t understand why she wants to do this writing assignment. In emdr, the therapist doesn’t need much in event or detail.

I don’t know much about EMDR, but I am about to start prolonged exposure therapy, and that involves telling things in as much sensory detail as possible. Over and over (not looking forward to it!). Maybe @Snowflake ’s therapist is just trying something a bit different because she thinks it will help in this particular situation.

@Snowflake , I am certain that your tx is not trying to catch you in a lie. Even if your assignment didn’t catch the events exactly perfectly, that is normal. You probably can’t remember traumatic details of childhood experiences perfectly as they are coded into your brain differently than non-traumatic adult experiences. But that does not matter—what you remember, how you remember it, is what is causing your ptsd symptoms. I’m sure she doesn’t demand perfection, either. Just do your best and that is all she can ask of you. If you bring it to her and she wants something slightly different, she will help you tweak it. Whatever you write will be fine.

 

[Snowflake]

I don’t know much about EMDR, but I am about to start prolonged exposure therapy, and that involves telling things in as much sensory detail as possible. Over and over (not looking forward to it!). Maybe @Snowflake ’s therapist is just trying something a bit different because she thinks it will help in this particular situation.

@Snowflake , I am certain that your tx is not trying to catch you in a lie. Even if your assignment didn’t catch the events exactly perfectly, that is normal. You probably can’t remember traumatic details of childhood experiences perfectly as they are coded into your brain differently than non-traumatic adult experiences. But that does not matter—what you remember, how you remember it, is what is causing your ptsd symptoms. I’m sure she doesn’t demand perfection, either. Just do your best and that is all she can ask of you. If you bring it to her and she wants something slightly different, she will help you tweak it. Whatever you write will be fine.

Thank you -I think I’m figuring it out. It’s challenging but interesting too.