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These medications are ruining my life

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I'm taking Lexapro now (Escitalopram) at 10mg. I have been on it 4 days now, and am starting to feel effects. It worked quite quick but my system is still adjusting. I felt more involved in life, more well-being, a sense of brightness to my day when I went outside, and a connection to people. I've noticed my head has stopped racing as I am lifted out of a dark obsessive, depressed place; that's the space I usually occupy.
It does concern me how I'm feeling weird, a little tired..very tired actually. But the "weirdness" of perception has changed, and I can't altogether tell if it's 'good' or bad. I'm definitely a world different when I'm on ad's. I was so detached before...detached and distant, a dark kind of obsessive place in which my head was always racing. I was so obsessive and intense before, it's hard to describe, but that was just me. I had gotten used to it... it's how I was/ and am. It's hard to describe where I was at. It seems so different now. Like night and day - and I wonder if this "medication" is normal. Maybe it's not, I don't know.
I feel like I've crawled out of a big dark cave and rejoined the world again. I think this is what normal feels like - more normal "serotonin", but not normal drugged and a plateau like flatness that I have. That's how drastic I feel. I feel alive again - but drugged at the same time. I know medication's artificial...so there's an artificial feeling with it. I don't like it, but started it because I was so down, and thought I needed it.

Honestly, I feel medicines like these would affect anyone that took them, in the same way. I don't like how I feel on meds, even though I am happier. If that makes sense. I just like being myself.

Look, I believe I know I'm chemically imbalanced in a sort of biologically sensitive way. I think its genetic or biological, but that I just am. It runs on my dad's side.. Anyways, I know this about myself and thought that a medicine would do good.

I'm going to give this a few days and see if it levels out.
 
The problem is I'm biologically and chemically imbalanced without these drugs - I suffer. And with them I'm a different person/ weird and strange.
Is this what normal feels like? What's my normal... I want to go with my old self but know I'm biologically depressed and anxious and crazy basically.
 
Effexor is an extremely dangerous med to go cold turkey on. The risk of seizures is present even with ju...
Agree here. And not only with Effexor. There are a few anti-depressants and anti-psychotics that you should never stop cold turkey because they might cause seizures. And, of course, any of the anticonvulsants that are being used to regulate mood. If you have more than one seizure, you officially have epilepsy and, trust me, life is messed up enough with PTSD and depression.
Nothing else I've ever been put on was that bad, but the "absent seizures" part is interesting.
Going off of many drugs without tapering can cause any type of seizure. Absence seizures are generalized onset seizures, just like grand mal (or tonic-clonic).
Doctors can offer plans that are too fast.
Totally agree with this. My neurologist tapered me off Topamax too fast and I couldn't sleep for 3 nights (and wasn't tired). Had to go back on it and now I'm experiencing the side effects again.
 
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Going off of many drugs without tapering can cause any type of seizure. Absence seizures are general...

When I went cold-turkey from Olanzapine, it wasn't just the 16 years of that. I was on stuff for almost 30 years, total, so these drugs appear to be bioaccumulative in effects and not just counter-reactive.

I've found that sunlight is an amazing medicine. It helps the body produce Vitamin D3, which helps boost serotonin a bit. While you do have to watch your daily exposure amount, eating your sunscreen through foods rich in anti-inflammatories and anti-oxidants helps reduce the UVA damage.

UVB is still a problem, but it's the one your body converts to D3.
 
It really requires courage to agree to try psych meds. We know we are suffering, yet becoming different than that is an unknown. Will the body/mind adjust to it? Will the benefits outweigh the risks? What if I don’t like the new me? My opinion is to keep an open mind, give whatever it is you take time to affect change and then decide. I know immediately if I can tolerate something. I know I’m addicted to Xanax, but I hate weaning off. It’s just too uncomfortable.
 
@Ellie May I can appreciate what you are experiencing. If it is withdrawal effects it will be a rough ride. Hang on!

I don't want to say everything will be better when you finally get off the drugs... but suffice to say they will stop interfering..depending on how fast your brain & body return to pre drug state.
My withdrawal from even short trials was horrible too. I don't have any tip's except drink water/eat lightly & don't take on anything physically or mentally taxing.
Many hugs
b1
 
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