Tired of my wife's yelling

[LuckiLee]

Her behavior is effecting you how can it not effect your children? It's changed who you are and it will change who your children will become. I hope you come to the aid of your kids when they are being verbally ASSAULTED!!

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

I can see that I'm in the wrong place.

I can see you only want what you want to hear. You want people to agree I get that I do.

I feel really horrible for digging my heals in I'm a people pleaser it gives me great anxiety to say something I know people don't want to hear. But I wish someone would've said something to my dad when I was younger I wish someone was looking out for me and my future.

I hope you find some solution that's going to put your children in a good position for the future and for the suffering that's ongoing to subside for all.

 

[The Albatross]

Hmmm. Communication, conflict resolution, support for the issues you acknowledge you need to work on for yourself... and best wishes for you and your family. It can happen.

 

[Yasmine]

My wife yells. On an average, she does it 2 or 3 times per week. Her yelling bouts last from a few minutes (rar...

As an adult and woman who grew up in a home like this I have to say
No this isn't, in my opinion OK.

Even id its OK to do it to her husband ,and it isn't imo its never OK to do this to your son
Ask yourself what YOUR CHILD is learning from this and how its affecting him now and how will it affect his future relationships?
If he yells at a women will that be OK?
Is he is everybody's punching bag? because the woman who says and sometimes acts like she's the person who loves him most treats him like rubbish ( even if its just a just a few times a week)

She must know this too
If she isn't aware of this and its a learned behavior that's fantastic she can change

I appreciate the fact that she's driven and works hard that's fantastic but in relation to what perhaps could be termed verbal abuse ( I assume she doesn't yell kind things at either of you ) and you calk yelling it is irrelevant?

Reverse the genders in this scenario

If you did this to her and your son ...would you, your friends or your family be OK with it ? If the situation were reversed would you and they take into account the fact that she was doing little to help around the house ? Maybe and some people might suggest she was traumatized and as a result she was acting like a victim of trauma and could not function effectively.

I'm so sorry but I think you are being verbally and possibly emotionally abused or at least being controlled by your wife terrible behavior
Have you brought this up with her? If not why? Are you worried about her reaction to being asked to stop?

Mate I watched my dad go from a healthy thriving male with lots of friends to a sixty something who , despite it appearing my mother wasn't alienating him from friends and family appears to have managed it anyway !

My brother is not only verbally abusive he hit his partner once ( he learnt this from my MOTHER who occasionally would hit my dad and he'd just say calm down he was much bigger than her but because if her gender he wouldn't dream of retaliation ) MY dad wasn't a weak man or a stupid one but she's slowly eroded his self esteem and self of self worth and friendships that didn't suit her and I was until very recently unaware of how to communicate effectively with a partner and felt my needs weren't important. Why because well my dad my say " my wife yells a bit"

 

[Ann S]

For your best, maybe it is best to ignore her.