Undiagnosed Very Lonely Very Afraid After A Horrific Accident

[gemm]

Hi
I'm gemm, I just joined the forum. I really need a friendly word right now. I'm very alone and very afraid.
Does anyone have a few moments to answer?

 

[Leah123]

Hi, gemm, welcome to the forum. There are many helpful people here. Do you have ptsd? Want to share what's scaring you right now? Not sure if I can help, but we can at least listen and let you know you're not alone.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Hello Gemm. :)

I am sorry you are feeling so alone.

There are lot of understanding and helpful people here. Feel free to ask questions. I am sure someone here will have some good advice for you.

Best wishes.

 

[gemm]

Hi Leah
I went to an hospital outpatient appointment 2 months ago, I was returning home in the ambulance, strapped in the back in my electric wheelchair. Another vehicle hit us head on at 135 miles per hour, the ambulance instantly exploded. 2 very very brave ambulance men managed to rescue me from the fire. I've been in hospital ever since with a brocken back and multple other injuries. I have horrible nightmares and flashbacks. I keep asking for help, but haven't got any. Maybe ssoon be able to go home, but I'm terried on going into an ambulance again, even being on the road. Each day the fear gets worse and worse, and sometimes I wish they'd just left me to burn.

 

[Leah123]

Oh my goodness!!!!!! You poor thing No wonder you are terrified! That's normal. It's natural, and it should get better, much better with time and help. I'm not sure where you've tried for help, I hope you will not give up on asking until you receive the help you need. Please keep at it. I hope others will be able to brainstorm with you better or offer more perspective, but know that you're not alone, and I'm very sorry this happened to you.

 

[rightkindofme]

Oh gemm that sounds really scary. I don't blame you for being afraid at all. Is there any one you can talk to about alternative transportation? At the very least it seems possible for you to be able to not ever be in an ambulance again.

 

[a3a2]

I simply cannot imagine how horrifying this experience must have been for you! Gemm, I am glad you survived this horrible accident. It certainly is understandable that you would have struggles with healing from this. I am glad you found the forum. Lots of great people here, so hopefully you won't be quite so lonely. And lots of great information here.

 

[ashdawn8287]

Oh my! I wish I could hug you right now! You came to a great place. This forum helped me overcome my lonely feelings. You have been through a lot my dear! It is okay. You are safe now. I'm hear if you ever need someone to talk with.

 

[Whitneys story]

Welcome to the forum. This is a very healing place. It will take time but reaching out is the best help.

You are a survivor! I do hope you find your way forward. Be kind to yourself and know you are not alone.

I understand the fear and letting it out will help give you focus for a resolve. I would be requesting an armored tank for my ride home. Hugs if you accept them, Whitney

 

[Queen Boudica]

Welcome Gemm. You need to get to see a psychologist and have therapy to stop full blown PTSD developing. Since the accident was in an ambulance, I am surprised that the hospital has not offered this to you and I would be insisting that they offer you some counselling immediately. This must be covered by insurance???

This was a very traumatic experience and you need therapy now. I hope you get the help you need soon as no-one should go through this alone. Are there any relatives or friends who can act as an advocate for you?

 

[intothelight]

Hi Gemm,

Welcome to the PTSD Forum! :)

I am not sure what country you are in, but being in the hospital they should be able to provide you with some counseling services while you recover. It is important to share everything you are feeling with your medical team so they can get you all the help that you need. I also hope you find the information and support here helpful as you work on healing.

Take care.

Debbie

 

[gemm]

Thank you everyone for all the replies and welcomes.

I got very upset last night and had to go off line. Finding some time and privacy in hospital is difficult. I'll try and answer some of the questions you have all asked.

I am in Scotland, still in hospital, and I have asked many times for help with the nightmares, flash-backs and ongoing feelings of terror and confusion - to date no help has been given. I think referals have been made to trauma counsellors and I've never had a clear answer as to why no progress has been made. Some staff have suggested that treatment will be done as an outpatient!!!! I can hardly begin to express how frustrating that is.

The psychology unit is only a few yards done the corridor from the rehab ward I am in. I feel as if I must be speaking in a different language - how can the staff not understand that even the thought of the journey home is terrifying me, let alone having to then undertake multiple other journeys for outpatient appointments. I really, really don't understand why these 8 weeks as an inpatient have been wasted, and that very soon the dreaded journey will be upon me.

I don't know if I have PTSD, I certainly don't have a diagnosis because I've never been seen yet. From the little I've read online it seems lke some form of PTSD that's affecting me. And it also seems like I'll have to try and overcome these symptoms myself. But to be honest, I'm a mess right now, and instead of things getting better they're getting worse. I keep asking for help and I've no idea why no one will help.
Thinking of you all
gemm