DID What do you do if you think you may have did?

[Llith]

This is an odd thing to post, I considered I may have DID years ago, but then dismissed it as me being over the top and dramatic. However a few things have happened recently that have highlighted this may be a very real issue.

The question is what do I do. Will getting diagnosed help or should I just live with it? I am seeing a therapist at the moment, and I am sure she has noticed my erratic change in personalities however I am still concerned she will laugh at me and dismiss it. I have a very bad history with doctors so I am terrified to go to them.

To be honest I am wondering if I am panicing over nothing, I have coped so far. I have realised I am used to loosing time and although it creates some awkward situations everyone just thinks I am forgetful. Is it worth getting help?

 

[Muted]

@Llith is your therapist trained to recognize or work with this?

Only you can decide if you're ready to deal with this and get help for this if you're diagnosed. I understand the doctor trauma, but there are safe ones out there. It might be helpful to have someone with you until that safety and trust is established. It's not always easy to find great doctors, but it's well worth it when you do.

Good luck @Lilth! Keep us posted!

 

[whiteraven]

It is worth getting help, if you can find a therapist who understands what you are dealing with and you get a proper diagnosis. I completely understand your worry about doctors; I have a huge issue with trust when it comes to all professionals. But, no therapist should ever laugh at you or dismiss a concern.

Maybe you can approach her with the symptoms you are concerned about. Like, mention the episodes of lost time. That will likely help get a conversation started and you can see where it goes. You can also gauge her reaction - if you are worried about that - without actually bringing up your thoughts about DID initially.

Best of luck!

 

[Llith]

@Gia1019 @whiteraven Thanks for your replies and the advice!

I am still too petrified to attempt a doctors, but I mentioned some stuff to T yesterday regarding dissociative disorders and how I think I have dissociated since I was very young. I also mentioned getting confused between what has actually happened and dreams and a few other things. She didn't laugh so thats a good start? I think I am just going to in each session kinda test the waters, see how she reacts. I may try losing time next week? I am such a coward some times lol.

I am not sure she can diagnose me, but its a start, I already have a relationship with her and have been seeing her for ages, so guess I can only try!

 

[whiteraven]

I may try losing time next week? I am such a coward some times lol.

Not sure what you mean by this? By "trying to lose time"?

 

[7Cs]

Not sure what you mean by this? By "trying to lose time"?

I think OP is going to bring up the subject of losing time with T.

 

[Llith]

I think OP is going to bring up the subject of losing time with T.

@whiteraven that is what I mean. I am just reluctant to tell her because it's not something I have ever discussed at all, and I mentioned some quite serious things to my bf, and he basically said that memory is an odd thing and there was no point worrying about it... Which has made me feel the therapist will say the same. Idk, I can only see how it goes.

 

[Laurie2001]

I do not think your T will dismiss you. People who don't know about trauma or DID just don't understand. Also DID is so common when we have been abused. I realized I have DID NOS. Meaning, I always know what I am who I am what age I am but I can feel like a child and behave like one. Or I can space out or freeze - I guess that's dissociating. I was diagnosed in the hospital, but also before by my therapist and I have had so much trouble accepting it - am just beginning to. I didn't even understand.

Anyway, I think it is worth getting help with and any therapist should be understanding and respectful of your experience and know that this is typical for those with ptsd or cptsd. Also there are specific treatments that can help. Good luck with it. I know its really hard.

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

To answer the original question - immediately, nothing happens.

At least it didn't for us - the thought occurred, we panicked, and nothing changed.

Do bring stuff up with your therapist, however. It is important for them to know. Also know that it typically takes six months after first considering the idea for a therapist to confirm a DID diagnosis, so if you think this might be true for you, you might not have confirmation for quite some time. This is okay. This is normal.

The thought first occurred to me two years ago. Three therapists later, it was finally considered by them, too, but it took me seeing her for seven months for her to confirm the diagnosis (and I switched in my very first appointment with her, too ....).

 

[Llith]

Okay guys, thanks for all these responses! I am going to do it next session or I never will. And if she laughs at me I shall deal with it. Best case scenario I have someone professional to deal with it instead of it spiraling around my brain. I think that would be helpful for me.

Thanks @theshadowoftheliving I think the reassurance that it wouldn't be an instant thing made me feel alot better about the telling her.

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

I'm glad this is helpful. I wish I had more to offer.