What Does Your Inner Child Need Right Now?

[221177]

Mine certainly doesn't need to be told she's useless, she's pathetic, she's not good enough, she might as well not try anything because everything she does is wrong, and to be stuffed with food, and choked on too many cigarettes...

She wants to be told she's safe, she's loved, she is being heard, and above all she wants to have fun, she wants to play, she wants to rest.. she wants all these things, and so often I forget.

So often the anger comes out of the cupboard, and I inflict it on myself, on her. The anger is allowed to come up, that's another part of me, and that girl needs to be heard too. She's angry at having her power taken away in the past, she wants me to listen so it doesn't happen again, so I will not run from her, from myself, I will simply notice and hear what she has to say, and make a step forward, because she wants to be heard and she wants action. She wants me to stand up for myself. Not in a demonstrative angry way, but in one that can defend herself where necessary, and that's okay.

So the two combined means positive action in giving my inner child/inner chilldren love, support, patience, an ear, fun, creativity, play, and for them to know that I love and accept them no matter what.

Of course I'm a new parent, it's all very scary and so often I can feel guilty for not doing the right thing, but they know as much as adult me knows that guilt doesn't serve anyone, and neither does punishment, understanding, forgiveness and love everytime.. so I'm asking them, her, me, to be patient with myself.

What does your inner child/what do you need?

:)

 

[Marie E.]

My inner child needs to stop being neglected and started be nurtured again. It is like I'm that young vulnerable neglected child again. Ignored. I have a teddy bear I have I would love to give her and I want to comfort her. I will take her hand and gently guide her into safety. I will tell her that she has no more need to fear or feel guilty. I will let her recover and try my best not to be angry with her. There are things that have happened and cannot be changed, but there is a future of moving forward with healing.

 

[suzie q]

I've never been able to "find" my inner child. I'm currently in search of her, but don't know where to start. I think I have lost her for good. She didn't come out in therapy, and after 8 years and an inpatient center, I don't know that I ever had one. Is that possible?

Unfortunately, my husband and I have never been able to have children, so that experience was never there to possibly trigger me. I watch other children play and interact in the neighborhood and smile, but feel no connection.

 

[221177]

Suzie - Can you remember what she felt so long ago? Can you picture her? (without triggering too much)

I envisage myself probably around 6 yrs old, often in a corner of an imaginary room, curled up, and too shy to even want to look up or engage in anything. I'd love to give her a hug, but if that doesn't seem right for me or for 'her', I simply envisage putting a blanket around her, or leave her a teddy, something nurturing to know she's loved somehow, even if I'm not there.. I keep visualising, and slowly I see her opening up a little, and I'll leave crayons, paper etc, & I can then begin to see her drawing pictures etc..

Sometimes I can't even picture 'her' and know she's a bit lost again but that's okay, I just start searching again, and try to find her in my mind and imagine where she is, and what she may need..

x

 

[Tinyflame]

I can't even fathom this concept, whatsoever, it's just totally beyond me. I feel uncomfortable with it, really. I know that I have parts of me that are 'childlike', but that's as far as I go.
-Yikes, sorry, shouldn't really say that here, I guess. I'm just not sure what all that means. I'm glad others are ~ok with (that), perhaps only some of us have one (an inner child)?

 

[suzie q]

My husband is very much in touch with his inner child, whom he met while working in therapy. He has explained the experience with me and it sounds so nurturing and healing. I just personally can't get there yet, or maybe I haven't found the right technique yet. I think it is perfectly OK to not be in touch, I just wish I could have the experience to help balance my therapy.

 

[221177]

I don't think it's something that everyone can do per se, or needs to do, I just find it a useful technique for me personally, so thought I'd share... :) xx

 

[The Albatross]

For a long time I walled off that inner child... compartmentalizing and isolating her. She needs love, acceptance and nurturing... I'm an adult now, and I'm trying to love, soothe, and nurture her. I am learning how to accept her as a facet of the gem of who I "am".???

 

[Nicolette]

My interpretation of this thread is that is about the Inner Child of PTSD Sufferers. Based on this I have moved it to the PTSD Section. If I have misunderstood please PC me and I will amend. Thanks

 

[Abrasky]

Mine needs a good time out. I have always mostly been so good, and now in the last year occasionally then this inner naughty child comes up and I can't stop giggling and getting up to mischief all day, before it settles down a bit. Oh boy I'm hoping this settles down or I am going to so get in trouble soon.

 

[suzie q]

221177...I hope you didn't think I was being negative about your topic. I would love to find my inner child. I think it is a completion of the healing process from early trauma. Can I live without that contact? Yes, but I don't think it is as settled as having a relationship with my little girl. Thanks for bringing up the topic, I hear so few on this subject!!

 

[just me here]

my inner child needs a good seat behind homeplate, the taste of a stadium hotdog, the smell of a leather mitt with a little bit of mineral oil on it to help break it in for the season, the sound of a good hard fastball, I need a baseball game, and soon. There are only two sport seasons, baseball season and everything else. Play ball!