What I Hate The Most About Ptsd

[Loveneverfails]

So I have told them that if it happens and I find myself in the middle of it I will 'step out' of it and leave them all to it until they have calmed down and sorted their differences.

That seems to me like a good way to handle it. I'm glad you've found a way to separate yourself from that. It has to be an extremely painful situation to be in. :( I think I'll try that with my own family, as I tend to stay longer than I should in confrontational situations with them as well.

 

[Loveneverfails]

I've heard that 'not trusting' is a way to control the outcome- we can control the trust won't be broken.

That's exactly what my T has been trying to get me to see. That there is a difference between trust and control. He says that essentially it can be a lack of trust in myself that causes my distrust in others. In my case he is right. I don't trust myself to choose the right sort of friends or situations and so I think everyone is going to disappoint or hurt me.

 

[Kundalini]

I hate feeling so very terrified. I will literally break out into a sweat even in the middle of winter. When I'm out on the bus or wherever and a man starts looking at me or leering at me I feel so terrified that I could faint.

 

[Srain]

I can relate to that, Kundalini! I am grateful for air conditioning at night due to waking up in a sweat. :(

I hate never knowing when I'll be "on" or able to show up and be "present". I'm still working on being able to handle this, it's more exhaustive the deeper into therapy I go.

I hate thinking, "I've finally got it!" only to fall flat on my face. Today's a good day, it's the first in several but how long will it last??

 

[cmd]

I hate that I'll go through long periods where I'm "Better" and think "I overcame it, I can manage the occasional freakout if something happens, especially if they're momentary!" And then, bam, it comes back and it's like someone flipped the switch and I'm drowning again.

I hate the "unperson" feeling, where I'm out of contact with myself and the world. It's even harder to explain than irrational freakouts.

 

[CaringMomma]

Marlene & Grama-Herc- Oh, how I completely understand the feeling of experiencing something fun and enjoyable and then having an anxiety attack for no reason. I go through on a daily basis. I'm slowly learning how to deal with these odd reactions. For now I take half of a Lorazepam for those episodes. But sometimes my body will still hurt, alot.

 

[CaringMomma]

((((Hugs)))) to everyone!

 

[HEART BROKEN]

I hate that PTSD has sucked all of the joy out of my love. Watching him struggle to be happy or to find happiness that never comes is so very sad for me. I feel so helpless watching him.

 

[CraftyCath]

Oh, how I completely understand the feeling of experiencing something fun and enjoyable and then having an anxiety attack for no reason.

I hate that too! I have a party coming up and I'm scared it will happen again! I'm still gonna go though!

 

[simplekindofgirl]

I am with CMD right now. It is hard- having a few days where everything felt okish- finally- and then suddenly one little trigger and everything is chaos again.

 

[Queen Boudica]

I hate that spending times with 'friends' should be a good experience where you come away feeling happy. Instead I come away feeling down, alien and beating myself up about how I am.

 

[Lionheart]

what I hate the most is also what I like the most, and that is hypervigilence. I hate that I am so fast to pick out the most negative thing that could possibly happen in a given situation and apply it to myself. This increases the anxiety exponentially. At the same time hypervigilence helps me to feel safe and it is for exactly the same reason. :confused: Go figure. :)