U.n.b.e.l.i.e.v.a.b.l.e what my loved one is going through.
Some people are unconscionably unconscionable.
Why do some people have to suffer so much, when they've done done of that to others? And others think their suffering is comparable, when they would be crawling under a rock if they suffered with a miniscule of what they cause others?
My brain, my psyche, is just what it is; full of limitations and strengths, and there is plenty of stuff I can't and don't have the ability to wrap my thoughts around, yet, let alone get out, in words.
I want to respond, but, the limitations of my brainpower are just too much, so I choose, just to be grateful, for whatever development I have made, so far, and look forward to making, still more respons-able progress, in the future.
If a situation is triggering, if people trigger me, I feel like I’m in a trap. When living feels like undoable, when you just can’t make the next step.. when Uncertainity feels paralyzing, Death is just around the corner, and many things can happen inbetween..
The fact that I have no friends in real life. And don't get me wrong, I love the friends and support that I have on here dearly. But I was so traumatised that I couldn't make friends with people. I didn't know how. I became completely isolated and other people just abused me and bullied me because of my illness. So many wasted years.
I could USE the horrible beeping as an excuse to throw a chair through a window... or ...I could make a dance beat. Make a dance beat, Friday. It costs less. And is less-cold-in-the-middle-of-winter.
WTF is this even a decision??? Nope. Don’t go there. Edgy as f*ck is a place. Knowing you’re there is a reason to get on top of shit, rather than an excuse to -FEEL BETTER- cough, lose your damn mind. Suck it up.