What Would Happen .....

[Sandstone]

Well, you want to make quite a dramatic gesture in giving your meds back to your T like that. Are you realising there was no help in your childhood and you are re-experiencing that in wanting T to contact you to give support? Are you wanting to test her and see if she rejects you? Are you saying that asking you to do that writing is too hard and you want out in one way or another?

 

[Snowflake]

Well, you want to make quite a dramatic gesture in giving your meds back to your T like that. Are you...

I don't really know....

 

[sun seeker]

So, what about talking to your T about it? Tell her what you were planning on doing and let her help you sort out the feelings behind it. That's one of the things they're good at. :-) If I remember what you said correctly, you have a session tomorrow. Could you bring it up then and see how that goes, and let her help you decide what to do?

 

[Snowflake]

So, what about talking to your T about it? Tell her what you were planning on doing and let her help...

Yes-I will try. Thank you

 

[sun seeker]

Oh and by the way, I'm not leaving because you did anything wrong, I just have to go to work soon. :-)

 

[joeylittle]

I have saved them just as a resource to end my life if I wanted to. No she is not the one that prescribed them-my psychiatrist did -they work closely with each other. She won't be happy regardless.

I did exactly this, probably a year and a half ago. I had been hoarding old meds, both psychotropics and pain-killers and injectables from a surgery. Me knowing my therapist, and knowing how strong my suicidal ideation was at the time, I was pretty sure he'd be OK with me bringing them in. So I did. And he was. I then also had to fill my psych in about it, because they talk to each other. I did, and she was glad I had done it. No-one was angry.

I assumed my therapist would just throw them in a safe, but he did actually drop them off at a pharmacy.

If you want to turn the pills back because you don't want the option of them sitting in your home, and therapist feels like the most possible way for you to get rid of them, I'd say go for it. If you think it's possible for you to take them to a pharmacy, do that. Either way, talk to your therapist about it, because getting rid of them is a significant and good step.

Sure, there's always the conversation about medication. Psychs talk about it because it's what they do. And they really are, most of them, looking for how to help. But if you don't want to be on meds right now, which should be fine with all of them so long as you are capable of keeping yourself functional and safe, then you do need to think about how to put some structure in place to help you navigate the 'downs'. It could be adding group therapy, or structuring in some CBT/DBT, or, or, or - there are many options.

But personally: I say, good for you on wanting to get rid of the pills, and follow through on that, however you need to.