Woke Up This Morning With Cuts Up My Arms.

[Wyakin]

I had a night of nightmares. Over and over I saw what happened to me. Normally this just leaves me exhausted and numb the next day but this morning I woke up with cuts all up and down my arms. They are jagged but don't look like I used my nails. I have never self harmed although recently I have been having thoughts along those lines. It's not something I see myself as capable of but now I am worried I got up in the night and did it.

Now I am scared to go to sleep I case something else happens.

 

[Maggiemay]

Hugs!!
18 months ago when my PTSD symptoms were at their worst I used to wake up in strange places, having scratched myself red raw - it looked like it had been burnt but done with my finger nail scratching repeatedly again and again... It was so scary as never knew where I'd wake up or what I'd wake up to... :( I ended up wearing onesies and putting soft gloves on my hands to stop me scratching. That and diazepam seemed to work...
X

 

[Wyakin]

I think I must have got up because my bedroom door was shut when I went to sleep but open when I woke up in bed. I have absolutely no idea how I have done it. My arms look awful though and I am having to wear long sleeves to cover them up. One bit goes on to my hand though and I'm really worried my manager will notice.

Thank you for sharing Maggiemay it makes me feel better to know it is not unusual even though I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Things seem to just be getting worse for me at the moment :-( I am still waiting for my referral to the mental health team almost two weeks after seeing my doctor.

 

[Maggiemay]

*hugs* I was luckily as never opened doors - although I often woke up in a ball in front of my bedroom door!! The times when I woke up in hallway, under dining table were when I forgot to close doors...

Are u in the UK? The whole referral system does my head in!! I had to wait ages even when my nighttime antics put me at huge risk and did a lot of damage :( Keep talking to your GP and they can prescribe sedatives which may help whilst waiting for mental health appointment - you shouldn't have to go on living like this x

 

[Wyakin]

I am going to lock my front door tonight incase I went wandering outside. I really cannot think what I did it on. Thank you for the hugs. It sounds like you have really been through it :( I live on my own so there is no one to notice when I do go nocturnal exploring and I live on a farm in the middle of nowhere!!

I am in the Uk. I see my doc on Tuesday for a follow up to starting my anti-depressants. Hopefully I'll be able to talk more than I did last time. Last time I was too terrified and panicky to get much out. I can't believe they would just hand me drugs and send me home alone for two weeks. I could have done anything!!

 

[Changing4Best]

...Now I am scared to go to sleep I case something else happens.

I might consider placing myself in a mental ward until this can be worked out. Also, are you taking any sleep aid? Sometimes these can induce sleep walking and if you have been thinking of harming yourself during your waking hours, you could do this to yourself again, only worse! Please consider placing yourself into wise medical care until all this can be worked out. This is, as you may well be aware, a life threatening situation and is an emergency until it is handled! Seriously.

 

[Wyakin]

@SheilaKathy I am not taking anything to help me sleep. The only medication I am on is citalopram. I am going to take everything out of my room that I might hurt myself on tonight and wedge my door shut in the hope it confuses my asleep brain enough to stop me wandering. If that doesn't work I think I will go to my Dad's until I have seen the doctor. At least that way my dogs are cared for.

 

[Changing4Best]

I guess that is a good plan, but be sure to take any glass out of there too, just in case!

 

[Wyakin]

Ooo had not thought of glass! I normally have one by my bed. Thank you for the heads up.

 

[Ladyghosthunter]

Wyakin, can you please PM me? I think this something more than just a nightmare.