Why Do People Want To Wear Ptsd As A Merit Badge?

[lostforgottensoul]

Because you are in that headspace you read threads of people with similar traumas and this validates you, helps you see your traumas as "bad".

Sort of. Not really "bad" but possible to be but the more I hear of traumas like mine amd the more people and even I tell them it shouldnt of happened and was bad (all the shit I should be saying to myself), the more I think it sort of echos back and inches ever so slowly my traumas to the direction of possibly "bad" and even in the direction of "bad"

You know a stubbed toe is not a trauma but this person thinks it is...so your brain then says maybe I'm over reacting also and my traumas are not really trauma.

Yes, totally. Like you would think that it would make my trauma "look worse" but in my head it has some opposite weird effect that I dont get.

@shimmerz you must meet one Criteria A but even so, you state as I do for Attachment Disorder; possible to be but not yet diagnosed (possible attachment disorder was my therapist exact words) or state "I think I might fit PTSD because of XYZ but not yet diagnosed". We have "undiagnosed" on here a lot.

@Ragdoll Circus oh i know you never know whats supressed or what the back story is. The thread I cited, the OP likely had PTSD...for child molestation that she later advised she was "over" but not from the quoted issue in the thread title.

Im a very non-judgemental person, so its not about judging them really, or really at all...I started out annoyed that PTSD seemed to be a go to self diagnosis for many; but have since, have learned its a me issue. The torture thread I think was sort of the "icing" for the overflow here but Im almost certian my dad and what he did and is still doing is what started it. Im almost in "more need", I think, for validation for some reason and I think I feel completely invaildated that I had any sort of trauma every day in my home now and so I think any little thing that would be a knat to one is the f*cking bigging flying bug on earth to me lol.

I dont know if im making sense or if im even correct in my 'inner looking' or way off.

*** SIGH *** So goes my life....

 

[ghotiff]

Like you would think that it would make my trauma "look worse" but in my head it has some opposite weird effect that I dont get.

I do "get it".
For me I was being sexually abused by the second guy for about 6years. People knew about at least the kissing part (my memory is limited regarding exactly what I said each time I reached out for help). It was brushed off / ignored by many many people, every single person that I reached out to (including my parents). What was internally ingrained from this was that it wasn't that bad, that I'd be fine, that I shouldn't let it upset me (it sure as hell didn't upset anyone else). That it is shocking when Csa happens to another child, but it's not shocking or upsetting or worthy of any attention if it happens to me. So someone's else's stubbed toe is very sad, but my abuse isn't.

Did that make sense?

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Did that make sense?

If you take your trauma out and put mine in then it would be my story and how my brain works so yeah, total sense! Sort of.

I reached out so many times with hints as I was made to believe Id go somewhere worse and fully believed that so was terrified to tell someone straight out but did have enough guts to ask a cop that wasnt the cop to arrest me and take me to jail, just dont take me home and was told I was a "wild kid" and needed to listen to my parents.

I can tell anyone that their trauma was bad, they didnt deserve it...including if there was someone with my exact trauma. But i cant seem to tell me that, its justified because it happened to me.

A stubbed toe, ouch im so sorry, that stupid table, whom put it there, you didnt deserve that....but I deserve all that happened to me. How does it make that leap? Or is it, my shit isnt as bad as the stubbed toe maybe?

 

[Whyteferret]

A lot of people don't understand the difference between adjustment disorder and traumatic stress reaction. Just after a traumatic event, it's normal to have PTSD- like symptoms. They go away as the person processes what happened.

Therapists are not supposed to diagnose PTSD until at least six x months after the trauma.

Folks with normal life stressors may have adjustment disorder or depression. But, by definition can't have PTSD. The DSM 5 is very clear about what is considered trauma and what isn't.

People are in pain and reaching out. I don't think it's nesssrisly a bad thing. If being in this group helps them resolve the problem and move on in life, isn't that important?

 

[lostforgottensoul]

People are in pain and reaching out. I don't think it's nesssrisly a bad thing. If being in this group helps them resolve the problem and move on in life, isn't that important?

I can agree with that, if they get help. But i am not against help in any form in any way.

 

[Suzetig]

I think too it depends on what you mean by "if they get help". Different people will find different things helpful at different parts of their journey and it may be the case that something which doesn't look at all helpful from the outside looking in is exactly what the individual needs at that time.

The bottom line is that this is a publicly available website offering peer support for folk impacted by PTSD. That means people who suspect they might have it, aren't really sure at all what's going on with them but think PTSD might fit and who are just plain in denial about their trauma will come here for a variety of supports and help. All of that is ok, I don't see too many people trying to claim PTSD as a badge of honour - I do see folk trying to make sense of what they experience while not wanting to face the extent of their trauma (avoidance anyone?). I have a lot of sympathy for this, given I still haven't fully acknowledged how bad some of my stuff was. If someone isn't there yet, they're not. I'd be very wary of deciding there was a right way to look for help here, eg they need to identify a Crit A trauma, need to recognise all their traumatic bits, can't be in denial, or be distorting their understanding of what happened etc.

The staff team are pretty good at identifying and dealing with trolls who pitch up without any intention of engaging in offering or accepting support.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

"if they get help"

I had someone in mind when I stated that but I agree with everything you stated.

In the end, its a me issue and I got to do a little inward looking.

In general (not speaking of the site), I still think its the go to for self diagnosing but this wasnt about that, its about me and why it bothered me so much.

I agree with your post, any help is good and many are in denial, minimizes, dont remember etc and gain support and help here and thats a good thing.

 

[Thizette]

Diminishing other's pain doesn't help anyone. We can't know what others have been through, or how it affected them, or why. For me, having the diagnosis was a relief. My therapist wasn't even sure of the source, as my life has been that traumatic. She said, "It could be from this, this, or that, or the things you can't remember from childhood, or some mix of those, but certainly you have it, and each thing you've experienced since then has only made it worse."

You should spend less time concerned with why others have PTSD and whether or not they're worthy of the diagnosis. That's not healthy for you or for them.

 

[Whyteferret]

Diminishing other's pain doesn't help anyone. We can't know what others have been through, or how it a...

@Thizette
It's fairly common for people to have more than one traumatic incident. They all blur together sometimes.

--------
Back to topic

Part of this situation is the media. People understand PTSD as something that results from something traumatic. For them, the emotional pain of a breakup, job loss, etc. is traumatic. PTSD makes sense to them. They think they know what it is. Depression or adjustment disorder is not nearly as exposed in the media.

People hurt for a variety of reasons. I agree with OP to a point. It does feel like it makes PTSD a catch all for people who experience stressors that really don't reach the level. For example. My boyfriend/ girlfriend breaking up with me won't cause PTSD. Domestic violence in a relationship can.

It's no badge of honor to me. I wish it would go the f*ck away. And take its little dog, depression, with it.

But, if someone wants to express their pain here and maybe learn something and/or find support to heal, more power to them.

 

[EveHarrington]

Perhaps if people are "wearing it as a merit badge"-------by which I mean bragging about having PTSD, telling everyone under the sun, "showing it off"-------then they don't actually have PTSD? (The initial relief period of being diagnosed not included.)

PTSD is hell at times and most people who truly actually have PTSD aren't blabbing about it to everyone. Why? Because we know that the symptoms actually are hard to hide at times, the symptoms that will indeed make us look "crazy" to society. We don't want to look crazy, we don't want to be abnormal, we just want to fit in with everyone else. (Hence the no badge thing.) If someone is wearing it as a badge (as described in my first paragraph) then I suspect they have a profound misunderstanding of what the disorder is as this stuff is SERIOUS business------those of us who know how much deeper it goes than the effects of normal life stressors can see the difference, but if stubbing your toe is indeed the worst thing you've ever experienced, then stubbing your toe may indeed seem traumatic.

Having said that, I don't see any of what I've described as being here on the forum. I have read stories elsewhere about fakers and such and this is where I'm drawing my thoughts from.

As another said, I think that if someone here had "PTSD" from "stubbing a toe" then they'd soon leave as they wouldn't really be in synchronization with the community.

Of course none of this is hard and fast------I'm sure there are people with legitimate PTSD who do run around bragging about it. Then again I'd lean toward PTSD being the lesser of their problems as it would be like bragging about having cancer!

 

[Kevin]

Trauma must be perceived by the brain to represent some intense significant danger for PTSD to occur. As one look around us would suggest, our perceptions of things vary greatly from person-to-person. A soldier who believes death on the battle field will bring honor to himself and his family, for instance, is at a much lower risk of developing PTSD than the soldier made to fight day-in-and-day-out with the rational fear of being brutally slaughtered, dying a slow death, or even worst, returning home and spending the rest of his life with brain damage, being the ultimate burden to his friends and family. These two individuals are going to have vastly different experiences of the same event. Perception is key to the reason why some people develop it and others don't, given the same traumatic event. In any case, any good doctor will admit that we only have theories as to what physiologically causes this debilitating cluster of symptoms. We go off of clinical observations and sometimes, brain scans that themselves are in their infancy of being understood by the scientific community (at present, we can only point to regions of the brain that light up and say, "That's the region that lights up when [x] occurs"). A "clinical diagnosis" while helpful, doesn't imply your symptoms are any less real than someone else's. Anyways, if you have PTSD already, it's probably best to focus on yourself and not let your stress response go haywire by random people on the Internet because we're all flawed to some degree, PTSD diagnosis or not, and it's especially important for us to focus on things over which we have control.

 

[Weemie]

I suppose it comes down to how you would define bragging. Anyone who is close enough to me to be my "friend" (AKA a person I see fairly frequently) knows I have panic attacks because I am unable to hide it.

I was employed for almost two years and I literally could not fake it. Everyone made up reasons why I was so "weird." It even had a negative impact when some coworkers got fired for drinking at work, people commented that I "seemed drunk." I was hauled into an investigation room and learned very quickly that no one had my back.

So I started talking about my panic attacks (not necessarily PTSD, but you know what I mean?) in public, without censure. Symptoms, not circumstances, but I mean, how many people could have taken that as me "bragging"?

I decided that it is easier for me to disclose in a setting where I have control than it is to be made out to be "crazy" or "high" or whatever else.