Why Do People Want To Wear Ptsd As A Merit Badge?

[mary1979]

Merit badge?
If it was as easy as collecting a girl scout badge for achievement in f*cked upness, where can I hand it back?

Know what though Lost.
Its all relative to ones own experience.
When I first read your stuff I was like 'wtf am I even whinging about when I stand myself next to this girl? I have no right to feel traumatised by comparison'.

I have this friend, she was the sweetest little thing, never a bad word to say about anyone, hard worker with lots of motivation. A really admirable person.
Or she was.
Shed had a sheltered life. Good family and easy childhood.
Then one day when she was 23 she was in a small car accident.
Nobody was killed, and she suffered only minor injuries.
But something snapped. Her tools for coping with stress just didn't exist.
She quickly developed an alcohol problem more severe than I've ever seen (I'm talking fatal withdrawal that required hospital, she would have seizures and they thought her heart would give out)
4 years later she was agoraphobic, living in her dads basement and drinking 3 litres of wine a day, facing 2 years in prison for drunk driving.
In jail she was diagnosed ptsd.

Easy for us who have always known stress and fear to look at my friend and say really? It was a tiny prang? Who are you to use this label I acquired after 20 odd yrs of hell?
But my friend wasn't an attention seeker, she wanted to be well, she just didn't know how.
Because she had never had to learn how to cope before. She had no clue what to do with those negative emotions.

Everyone's trauma is real and hurtful to them. Regardless of what's perceived on the outside.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Diminishing other's pain doesn't help anyone.

I wasnt diminishing their pain.

You should spend less time concerned with why others have PTSD and whether or not they're worthy of the diagnosis.

I would appreciate it very much if you didnt tell me what I should or shouldnt do with my time. I understand that this might be coming from a concerned place and I do appreciate the concern but earlier in the thread I had already figured out why this 3 yr old thread had made me as upset as it did. And I even stated she likely had PTSD but not for the titled reason.

Oh, and some do think PTSD is merit badge, such as my father whom was faking PTSD in the VA to try to become 100% disabled and the therapist advised he didnt have it but walks around the house saying he has PTSD right & left (like a merit badge) and being the man minimizes my past to me until it isnt even abuse and he played a part in it, I think I have a right to my feelings.

And as a reminder; I was not speaking of those diagnosed with PTSD or even has trauma that could have possible PTSD undiagnosed; I had quoted a 3 yr old thread that had a title "can you get PTSD from being cheated on" and those arguing that you can was bothering me. I learned it was a me issue likely due to partly my dad and partly the abuse vs trauma thread that triggered me or at least gave me enough stressors to have an upset over it.

Not a big deal. The thread is 3 yrs old. I talked it out. I get it. End of story.

Im sorry that I posted something that is seeming to make others upset. Im sorry, ok?

 

[Sideways]

Hey there beautiful warrior lady:)

Quit apologising. It's all there in the thread if people care to read. You ended up realising this thing with your dad's bogus claim was having a much bigger impact on you than you were giving it credit for, so the process had value.

People replying to the thread title rather than the thread content? Meh! Not your problem. But if you need to shut them down because it's getting to you, ask for the thread to be closed.

Those of us who have followed along understand what the deal is. The rest is just noise:hug:

 

[mary1979]

Oops. I am one of those non readering all the posts types mentioned above.

Sorry @lostforgottensoul, I hadn't been on much lately and was too focused on my own view to see yours properly, my bad.

I didn't intend for my comment to make you feel defensive xxxx

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Thank you @Ragdoll Circus :hug:

@mary1979 it wasnt your reply spefically as i can always read the caring-ness in your replies. I guess it was the collective whole and the ones i quoted.

I forgot to reply:

Part of this situation is the media. People understand PTSD as something that results from something traumatic. For them, the emotional pain of a breakup, job loss, etc. is traumatic. PTSD makes sense to them. They think they know what it is. Depression or adjustment disorder is not nearly as exposed in the media.

I think the media has a huge play in those screaming PTSD for any sort of life stressor (as in not a trauma) such as a break up or job loss etc.

And thank you for your reply!

 

[lostforgottensoul]

But if you need to shut them down because it's getting to you, ask for the thread to be closed.

I reported it asking for it to be closed, it wasnt. Thats ok. I'll just correct anyone that doesnt understand what I was saying.

 

[joeylittle]

We don't tend to lock threads unless they've gone radically off course. There may be responses on this thread that you disagree with, @lostforgottensoul - but there's nothing to warrant locking it.

You also don't need to keep coming back and correcting people. Sometimes there's very useful stuff to be learned, beyond the lesson that we think was there.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

We don't tend to lock threads unless they've gone radically off course. There may be responses on this thread that you disagree with, @lostforgottensoul - but there's nothing to warrant locking it.

I only asked due to:

But if you need to shut them down because it's getting to you, ask for the thread to be closed.

Its ok that you didnt lock it, was just a request.

You also don't need to keep coming back and correcting people.

Im correcting those that are stating incorrect information. This was never about people with PTSD or trauma with possible PTSD wearing it as a merit badge...it was those people going through life stressors screaming PTSD.

ETA: Those posting about people with PTSD or a trauma that is possible to be PTSD undiagnosed would be off topic.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

This thread is about undiagnosed people, who have not experienced a Criteria A event insisting they have ptsd for what appear to be ulterior motives.

Please stay on topic. Discussion of people who have diagnosed ptsd, or have suffered a criteria A trauma is off topic.

 

[ghotiff]

I wanted to say that being misunderstood is a trigger for me, particularly when I have done everything "right" and the misunderstanding is because of others overly quick conclusions.

Your thread was and is very clear. Other people reading in other irrelevant facts is on them. I just want to make sure you knew this and felt supported as you explore this topic.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Thank you @ghotiff! That means a lot! :hug:

You and I share that trigger...

 

[ghotiff]

Thought we might :hug:

My T tried to explain the "why" of the trigger to me once but I didn't get it and due to costs I've had to take a break from therapy.