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Other I'm A Pretty Joke

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I really don't think people understand how crippling it is to lose a sense...let alone TWO. I was not born this way. This is not in any way fun, easy, or dismissable by saying someone else has it worse. This is worse this feels TERRIBLE. I can't smell ANYTHING. My house could be burning down and I wouldn't even know it unless an alarm was blarring. Yeah there are detectors but do you know how crappy it feels to not smell ANYTHING. Not one thing. Not anything not taste ANYTHING NO TASTE? Can you really say you understand how that feels?
 
For someone to reply and understand makes me cry. I feel so alone and for you someone on the interne...
My family doesn't understand me either. I've had the hardest time finding my place within my family throughout my recovery. I've been told many times they don't understand my "lifestyle" following numerous failed relationships w/ men & my choosing to remain single during segments of my life. This website has placed a broader face to trauma & it's felt incredibly validating to know there are so many others struggling w/ this condition. I hope you can work towards inner peace, to one day see & feel the beauty that resides inside & out. It's there, tho it can take time to recognize it from within when we've experienced trauma.
 
I'm sorry if I sound angry....BUT I am, I'm really hostile too. I want to tear my apartment up and drive my car off the road. I'm so angry. I don't know what a Criterion Trauma is. I'm sorry. I can't quote because I got a warning. I don't understand this board. I probably shouldn't have posted here but I have no one to talk to. I called a crisis line and they just seem stupid like teenager working to make some cash or something. I don't know, they just didn't seem interested..and why should they? I mean they don't even know me. smh
 
@PrettyJoke - welcome.

You'll get many different kinds of input from this site - take what's useful, and leave the rest is a good motto that many of us use.

I can't imagine what it would be like to be going through what you are; I think many members here can empathize in terms of their own experiences with medical mystery issues that can't get a good diagnosis, and how frustrating it is to not be taken seriously.

Are you in therapy? If not, I'd strongly suggest it. You are depressed, and therapy will help you deal with that, even if the underlying reason for it (your loss of smell/taste) stays a problem.

We are primarily a PTSD forum, but sometimes have members dealing with mental health issues that aren't specifically PTSD. Take a look around, get a feel for the place. Welcome.

I can't quote because I got a warning. I
Edit to add: you can quote; you got a pretty common warning to not quote full posts, is all. You can highlight the portion you want to quote, or just tag the member using @ before their user name.
 
You know what, from that description I do think I have Criterion A trauma....something happened to me when I was 19 and I thought it wasn't a big deal but I think it was a big deal after all. I'm a mess and I can't bring myself to see a therapist again...last time I did it I felt so small. I know you have to keep trying but I can barely go to work I don't think I will make it to a therapist. I just want to run home. This is frustrating.
 
Healing downright sucks. It's pretty damn hard. But the alternative is staying as is or getting worse. I don't think you want that to happen, right?

Getting therapy can be hard------you can start by learning coping skills which will help you calm yourself in these "freak out" moments. (I have them myself.) There are lots of posts on coping skills or you could start your own thread asking about coping skills so that the focus is on helping you.
 
You've probably changed a great deal in 9 years. I'd seriously challenge you to try again. I know it's hard - everything is hardest when you are at your lowest - but it's going to help.

There are lots of good threads on how to find one, what kinds of questions to ask, etc. You can also ask other doctors for referrals.
 
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