Devastated

[trying to heal]

So I have just come back from an appointment with my T. I had been anxious about going as I hadn't done the prescribed work beforehand but she was absolutely lovely about it all and reminded me that the whole idea of therapy and the homework is to help me get better not to make me feel worse. About 15 mins into the appointment she let me know that she will be finishing up in the next month or so as a psychologist at least for a period of years and that I will need to consider transferring to one of her colleagues. I just started crying and crying and just can't stop. Feeling so lost and terrified and abandoned. Because of the need to discuss what to do next and the whole transference process I wasn't able to talk to her about just how low I've been and the creeping back of self-harm behaviour. I now have 3 weeks till I see her again for the last time. I just feel so broken now. To make matters worse on the way home from the appointment I had my second car accident in the last 4 weeks. Both times someone has either driven into or reversed into my car so hasn't been my fault but it just shakes me up and contributes to my feeling of everything being too much.

 

[WishfulThinking123]

I completely feel your devastation/feelings of abandonment. Due to a conflict of interest in the past I was told I had to stop seeing my T and I literally did the same thing...just started crying. It may be helpful if instead of just handing over the notes if your current t could also have a personal conversation with the new t so, they can know what you have already told/said so, you don't have to feel pressured to start at the very beginning with someone new. You can then kind of start where you left off? I am also very sorry to hear about the car accidents and I hope there were no injuries! Well, I hope I helped even just a little bit. You will be in my thoughts and prayers this evening.

 

[Teamwork]

Feeling for you and with you. It makes me wonder why they don't give a bit more notice ? I don't know it's always so sudden and you feel jerked into a different reality. Surprises are really tough, but if your thinking of leaving practice then it would be a long thought and worthy of hinting about or giving a better warning? I don't know. Would telling you sooner have helped?

 

[GWhizz]

Really sorry this has been landed on you so suddenly. Did she explain why? I know in my work that applying for a career break can be pretty uncertain and if approved it may be only a month's notice period before you actually accept the break period. And not knowing for sure means I'd never forewarn clients because it may not materialise. But thankfully I'm not a therapist! I'd assume a therapist should at least be responsible and mindful enough to consider the potential implications and advise clients that it's at least a possibility once they have decided it's on the agenda.

I wouldn't necessarily suggest her discussing your details with any other potential colleague or that she would until you yourself have met someone you feel comfortable with and that you can trust. Sorry everything has been compounded by your car accidents. That must have been scary and unnerving.

I really wish you all the best in finding a new match that meets your needs. And that you can harness your inner resilience and outer supports to navigate this seemingly muddy path right now. And I know it's probably annoying to hear right now, but change - although scary and discomforting - can bring new insights otherwise not possible.

 

[Suzetig]

ts because it may not materialise. But thankfully I'm not a therapist! I'd assume a therapist should at least be responsible and mindful enough to consider the potential implications and advise clients that it's at least a possibility once they have decided it's on the agenda.

I think that's really difficult because if it's not approved - or your job application isn't successful you've raised anxiety unnecessarily. If it is, you have very little control over timescales. I work with people who are quite vulnerable. I resigned from a job recently and was given 3 weeks to tie off my work with people, some of whom I saw fortnightly. I knew I was planning to leave but if I'd told them when I was looking for a new job they might have worried for months but when I did finally find a new role there was very little ending time. And the time I had was completely out of my control because someone else managed my diary.

Some times it's hard because it's hard.

 

[GWhizz]

I think that's really difficult because if it's not approved - or your job application isn't successful...

I totally agree. I wouldn't like to find myself in this situation professionally. It really is a professional and ethical dilemma and I guess that requires expert experience and ability to gauge individual clientele needs. The unnecessary anxiety provocation may be more harmful for many. Very very hard to balance that.