T wants me to take down my google review of her

[Deleted member 38906]

Is it evil/wrong to leave a bad online review for an ex T you didn't like? and should you take it down if they ask you to?

My ex T whom i fired a couple months ago called me tonight (and emailed) asking me to take my 2 star review down. she said im sorry you felt hurt by me but its not right to leave a fake review for someone. ive been a T for a long time and your actions have consequences. and then she asked me to take it down bc its meant to damage her reputation.

i feel really bad for what i did bc i used a fake name on my google review (my friend's name) cause i didnt want her to know it was me. this is what i said in the review: "I saw T at this practice for relationship issues. She was able to give me some really good communication tools that helped me and my husband's relationship. However, I wouldn't recommend her for individual therapy as she doesn't have the expertise for deep emotional work. I felt judged by her a few times as well. Overall I would go back to her again with my hubby (if I can convince him) for relationship advice, but nothing more."

i just saw her for individual and i made up the part about her helping me and my husband bc i wanted ppl to still see her for relationship stuff just not for deep trauma work. i wanted to seperate the individual trauma work from couples therapy.. i also didnt want her to know it was me. if i was to write

reviews are reviews not compliment boxes. maybe there is a level of authenticity that was missing but the message would have been the same if i were to write a review with honest details...the message would be the same. changing the details was my way of being anoynymous..but i guess it didnt work at the end.

anyway, does this prove that i am evil? and should i take it down?

ps. I wrote about why i fired her on a different thread.. but in a nutshell it was bc she was telling me to wish my abuser well: https://www.myptsd.com/threads/on-firing-t.79960/

 

[Fadeaway]

I went back and read your other thread, and she doesn't sound able to deal with childhood trauma at the hands of a parent at all. I would be pissed if someone told me to wish my abuser well. Wish them a hefty dose of karma, but not wish them well.

Since she now knows it is you, how do you feel about going back and posting a real review in exchange for taking the other one down?

 

[BoN-bOn]

I wouldn’t leave a bad review for anyone unless they violated some major ethics or something. I don’t think you’re evil, you’re certainly entitled to your opinion but leaving a review like that is very damaging to someone’s career & livelihood.

 

[Deleted member 38906]

I went back and read your other thread, and she doesn't sound able to deal with childhood trauma at th...

yup, i was really pissed too and hurt..i would feel bad writing another review now.

 

[Deleted member 38906]

@BoN-bOn but google encourages to write review bc consumers rely on reviews to chose services...i thought i was doing society a favor

 

[Esterio]

Hi there Moo. Thanks for the thread
I don't read reviews and believe them to be made up crap. I would think you misrepresented yourself and lied. That seems like Liable to me. If I were going to leave an online review I would buck the trend and tell the truth. Some people believe whose things and make poor choices because of made up reviews. I hope you took it down. If you feel wronged by someone in the medical or mental health system or any where else complain where it may do some good with their superiors. Thanks for the post I have wanted to voice my opinion on on line reviews.
She may be a bad T in your view and have every rite to complain just be truthful about it. My thoughts anyway.
Peace be safe

 

[BoN-bOn]

@BoN-bOn but google encourages to write review bc consumers rely on reviews to chose ser...

I understand. How did she know it was you?

 

[Deleted member 38906]

i gue

I understand. How did she know it was you?

i guess she googled my friends name (i used my friends account) and found out we were friends on Facebook.

 

[Tornadic Thoughts]

How does your friend feel about you using their name to review a mental health professional? I think leaving false information doesn't serve anyone well. I would rewrite it and factually represent the actual experience. She may very well suck at the relationship counseling part of things, too, as many times they include trauma related topics, and you could be setting others seeking that kind of help up for more of what you experienced. How can a review from a false persona based on lies be considered doing society a favor?

I vote for keeping it real in these situations and following through with what I perceive to be incompetence by first directly addressing it, then if I have no luck, taking it to folks who can enact a change, if for nothing else but as a means to hopefully help heighten their awareness of how they are coming across and how they're doing more harm than good.

I try not to write things I'm going to publicly post when I'm in the middle of an emotional tsunami, but I fail at that sometimes, too. I don't think it makes anyone evil, but it certainly can create a whole lot of unnecessary energetic exchange, not to mention major drain and brain strain on the giver as well as the receivers of such outbursts/choices. She didn't serve you well, and you didn't serve yourself well by choosing to approach it from that manner. Why are you uncomfortable with posting how it really was? Or maybe a better question is what's at the root of that feeling?

 

[nowthisisme]

I am a business owner and a customer left me a bad review once. I had over 75 five star reviews and 1 very bad review. At first I was really upset about it because the customer never bothered to call and address his concerns, It was never brought to my attention that there was a problem. I tried sending him a nice message asking him to contact us and reconsider his review but he never replied. I simply replied back to the review in a professional manner. But it still upsets me sometimes because that's the first thing that appears when someone searches for my business.
If you tried to express your concerns with her and she wasn't helpful then keep the review but if you didn't give her a chance to explain herself then maybe you should remove it.

 

[Sideways]

Depending on the laws where you are, it may be a defamation issue if parts of the review are factually incorrect...

 

[Deleted member 38906]

How does your friend feel about you using their name to review a mental health professional?...

I did directly try to address it with her, but i didnt feel like she heard me or tried to fix things with me after i told her that she hurt me.
She doesnt have a supervisor so i cant talk to someone higher than her.
i guess when i wrote the review i was like what would i have liked to know about her before i spent 6 months worth of therapy on her...that shes not good with childhood trauma but perhaps good with giving communication tips. i thought the details of the review where periphery. anyway i dont feel good about lying so im def not going to leave it like that..i just dont think i can write another honest review (especially since i am the only one who has ever reviewed her google page)...id rather be a pushover and take it down..i dont want to be seen. now that shes seen me, i want to hide. im too ashamed of what i did.