DID My therapist insisted i have did, but i think she's wrong. could i be in denial?

[Hashi]

I've wondered why I don't have DID given the nature and extent of childhood trauma. I think it was actually my ability to dissociate in other ways that meant I didn't develop it. I have no idea about the accepted scientific theories but my personal theory is that a lot of dissociation - especially blocking certain things out - can mean not getting DID, rather than always being likely to lead to DID.

 

[CVC]

The more I learn about dissociation and dissociative disorders, and the more I hear from people on this forum, the more I'm convinced the various "diagnoses" are arbitrary ways of classifying and differentiating a whole constellation of self-preserving mental habits we develop as a survival mechanism. I won't get into a philosophical discussion of what it even means to call these survival strategies "disorders," but I do think it might be a mistake to get caught up in nailing down diagnoses. In the end, I guess I'm realizing the variation in "disorders" (and symptoms that don't fit existing disorders at all!) is testament to the huge creative and adaptive potential we all have at our disposal. DID is just one way to manage intolerable stress, and for whatever reason I guess clinicians have really focused on that one. But it seems like this forum is filled with people who have hard-to-classify dissociative stuff going on. So maybe the actual diagnosis is not so important.

I regret that my T seemed to think diagnosing was so important, as I think obsessing over a diagnosis may have kept me from doing the (more) important work of trying to feel better.

 

[HemlockGrove]

a whole constellation of self-preserving mental habits we develop as a survival mechanism.

That is exactly what dissociation is! It is a huge spectrum ranging from just spacing out (Which everyone experiences) all the way to DID (Which is basically just dissociation so bad that your personality has become sectioned off into parts or different voices or various "roles" you were forced to play [Either protecting yourself or just trying to get through or even fighting back, among many many other possibilities]). It becomes a "disorder" when it interferes your day to day life (Some people have DID very strongly but it is so well managed by their "main personality" that it doesn't interfere and may even help them in day to day life.) For example my dissociation is relatively under control - "I" am always in control of my actions, it's just my thoughts that dissociate (However, that can get to be quite bothersome!) - therefore, my psych. said it isn't something to worry about. Now if it ever DOES become a problem then it'd be something to worry about:)

 

[Abstract]

She told me that she basically believes that anyone who undergoes severe enough trauma (whatever that means) at a young age ends up with DID.

That says it in a nutshell! She is exactly the type of therapist that is causing so much controversy and I believe is making it harder for those who truly do have DID (and the more severe versions of what was called DDNOS) to be heard and get help. It annoys me actually. I think getting you to start having conversations between your parts when she knew nothing about your internal workings is quite worrisome.

Some people are just not that prone to dissociate. There seems to be a biological as well as other factors that influence how someone reacts. We all develop our own unique range of coping reactions. I wouldn't even be surprised if she too doesn't have DID. My dissociative reactions are out of proportion to my trauma. Others will have truck loads and not be that way inclined.

Therapists need to open their ears and listen to what the person is saying and treat that individual.

 

[HemlockGrove]

My dissociative reactions are out of proportion to my trauma.

Off topic - But it so so unbelievably good to hear someone else say this!! I mean - I'm sorry that you have to go through an exaggerated dissociative experience - but I am so glad that I'm not totally bizarre! (or blowing things out of proportion!)
I love days like this one, when I don't feel as alone:)

 

[CVC]

Therapists need to open their ears and listen to what the person is saying and treat that individual.

Yes, please! If only it were easy to find such a therapist...

 

[Bluerose]

Their job is to listen. Our job is to make sure we’re not simply expecting them to tell us what we want to hear. The truth hurts.. a lot. But it can also be very healing.

 

[shimmerz]

If I had a nickel for every dx I got I would be rich, I swear! I don't put much faith in labels. My understanding of the distinction between DID and other forms of dissociation is that you actually lose time and cannot account for it. Sometimes hours, sometimes days. Not 'I forgot" but instead "I have no idea at all". If you feel like that is happening and you have a camera or a voice recorder (noise activated), it has been my experience that setting it up to tape yourself will allow to you see the "switch". Not sure it wouldn't be triggery to watch yourself switch if you were not ready for that though.

If you don't lose time it is my experience that co-consciousness is occurring. This is not a complete splitting of self but instead more of a regression experience. Usually people who know you well can see the far away look in your eyes or a literal changing of facial expressions etc.

 

[Abstract]

lose time and cannot account for it. Sometimes hours, sometimes days. Not 'I forgot" but instead "I have no idea at all"

Hi shimmer. I think you can have this happen without it being DID and it be other types of dissociation. For example dissociative trance or amnesia. In fact that is true for me. But I agree that it can be a sign.

 

[shimmerz]

Ah, thank you @Abstract. I trance as well but remember what happens during my trance. My apologies for putting out information that was incorrect.

 

[Abstract]

Thats Ok shimmer. Thank you. :) Nothing to apologise for. I think I understand why you said it. Just wanted to say in case someone who blanks and doesn't have DID reads and comes to wrong conclusion. .