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Too Much Therapy?

  • Post starter Post starter ILovePurple
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ILovePurple

My T suggested in a session today that it may be worth me taking a break from therapy. I'm a young ctrauma sufferer age 21.

When I started therapy I was anxious, depressed, self harming and had suicidal thoughts. I now have much much improved and do not self harm at all.

I'm in therapy the guts of a year and a half. I will admit, I have talked about so much and I do admit, I have had a lot of therapy**. I would readily try a therapy break only my stability is very fragile. I am very stable and level headed but I still can be knocked the whole way back to suicidal thoughts and self harm on a bad day.

My T is by no means forcing me, just suggesting it. But I'd be interested in knowing your opinions.

** admittedly, I needed it to save my life
 
Sometimes it is worth it to take a break to process. Sometimes it is not. I think as long as you have rapport and can go back sooner than planned if you feel you need to it is worth a try.

Personally, I am in the process of moving but I want to get to a point with my T where I can go in periodically (once a month or two) to check in/keep rapport and plan on having therapy during my times of year when I tend toward the symptomatic. During the better times of year I've done enough work that it's just a reminder to keep using my skills and the therapy can drag me down when I personally would rather be glad for the annual break in my symptoms. But I know that when I am symptomatic I need support, and I need it without a ton of backstory and building of a relationship. Some people need that weekly check-in to stay stable. Some people are fine going without for a while just to take a break from all the work when they're relatively stable.

It's really about what works for you, and being willing to change the plan to adapt to changes in your symptom levels.
 
I've stayed in therapy steadily and as I got better I expanded the things that I did in life (work, make new friends, delve in to deeper memories) so the once a week therapy helped me stay stable because I life continued to be challenging.

How often do the bad days come? What are they triggered by - things that seldom happen in daily life or things you encounter more often? Are you happy with where you are at now in terms of functionality or are you wanting to take on more?

What are your therapists reasons for suggesting a break? So that you can not have the memories and trauma so present in your daily life? (mine were anyway)

And: are you still making progress in therapy, can you afford the cost and time it takes? If so, maybe you want to stay in and take advantage of that opportunity.

Maybe answering some of those questions will help you decide what to do. And, you can ask yourself deep inside, in a quiet moment, what feels right for you. Let the answer come from an inner voice.
 
I would say if you feel you hardly ever have bad days or are no longer making progress it might be time to see how it goes without therapy. If you are still having semi-frequent bad days and continue to make progress with your T maybe just cut back and see how it goes. I find it is pretty telling for me to see how every two weeks goes and I think I at least do better if I know when the next date is even if it's further. If you are good for a while on every two weeks try once a month for a few months and if you still are good I think you're probably pretty ready to end at least for now. Hope that helps.
 
Can you share what type of therapy you're doing?

If on a bad day you can be knocked back into self-harming, I would say now is not the time to try and go it alone.

I decided to make the leap to no therapy a few years ago, but my self harm was down to maybe once or twice a year. A bad day didn't cause self harm. It had to be a REALLY REALLY bad day to push me to that point. I was also post-processing. I knew it was time to try and go it alone.

If you're still self harming on bad days, then you haven't found the right set of coping skills just yet. I'd stick it out in therapy. If all you're doing is talking about the trauma, I'd say its time for a new kind of therapy. (I have done many types of therapy over the years, and I'd say that most of us need to get skills from multiple therapists and multiple types of therapy in order to be successful long term, especially in instances of complex or childhood trauma.)
 
you haven't found the right coping skills

I think that is very true!

I'm going to talk therapy, we go quite deep into issues. On only one occasion in the last few months have I actually self harmed on a bad day but the other times it was much too close for me.

I do almost feel a bit babyish like a baby who can't stand being without their mom. I'm still making progress and there is a lot to be made. I think I am possibly a bit burned out of heavy therapy.
 
I do almost feel a bit babyish like a baby who can't stand being without their mom.

Apparently, when little children are exploring a new area, they need to know their mother is in a particular location. Then they can toddle off a little way, come back and reassure themselves that safety is still there, wander a bit further, come back for reassurance, and so on, building up a little more on each trip.

It sounds as though you have picked the perfect analogy of what you need.
 
Apparently, when little children are exploring a new area, they need to know their mother is in a particu...

Hi Stenni, thanks for the comment! My only other worry is the fact I get depressed when I'm not in therapy
 
I don't think you're being babyish at all. I think you're learning to stand on your own.....something that is quite admirable. I think that taking some time off would possibly be a good thing if it is on a trial basis. That is, take the month off and see if you can handle things on your own. It may give you more insight into your problems. I was just worried that you were going to say goodbye to your therapist/therapy altogether......but, I do think that breaks can be good for us because we can learn to rely more on ourselves. Good luck!
 
I get depressed when I'm not in therapy
What sort of depressed? Do you mean unhappy, or numb, or destructive or…
And how do you know you get like this? How long is it since you had a break?

Sorry if these questions are phrased bluntly, that's my fatigue, not anything personally aimed at you
 
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