Relationship 2 Months Of No Contact And About To Break

[Dimmers]

Hey, I was with a girl for 2 and a half months... around 3 months ago. Now I know it wasnt long and this is the first time its ever happened but I cant get that girl out of my head. After trying to talk with her a month after break up (she basically broke down infront of me saying she overlayed the feelings of her abusive ex onto me) she cant handle seeing me because of the emotion.

So as painful as it was I closed the door, blocked her on FaceBook, deleted her number and that was that. She was hoping to be friends and maybe she could get better over years but its too long (also she could not handle 1-1 time with me back then after she snapped.

Every fibre in my being is saying DO NOT contact her, there are too many unknown variables and there is an issue of a male friend who said he loved her while they were dating and she said she can be friends with him because he does not trigger her as hes a drunk with issues as I am a healthy guy who she had feelings for.

A few weeks ago I met a girl, a great girl and no matter what I do I cant get close to her as in my emotions are just numb with her. This is new as I left her house tonight as much as I hate to admit it, I for the first time in a while had my ex pop into my head. This is weird as I am 31 and its never happened and all these emotions came flooding back.

I dont want to string this girl along who is healthy emotionally and her values and everything about us just click but I feel nothing for which is weird for me because the more I spend time with someone the closer I become but i am just numb.

The more I think about contacting my ex the more stupid the idea sounds but in the past 3 months I will be honest I just cant get her out of my head. Part of me wants to see her soo badly and the other side is just screaming to not even think about it.

I never thought I would come on this forum again, but any advice would be great.

 

[amethist]

Hi Dimmers

As hard as it is you have to move forward, for your own sake if nothing else. It sounds like your still grieving for a relationship that might have been. This in itself is not healthy, even if there is no PTSD involved.

Instead of looking for another girlfriend for now, concentrate on being with your mates, have some fun with them. Stop looking for something that is not there, and look tot he things that are and always have been there.

It takes time to let go of someone you cared for, but it will be for the best in the end.

Take care and go have some fun without any emotional attachment.