Am I On Another Downward Slope?

[trying2movefwd]

If I am having thoughts such as "I would welcome death if it came." Or "Life is too hard to live" or "I have messed up my whole life by trying to heal" and I have a plan for "if I need it"...I wonder just how far away I am from despair? I'm functioning though...and "trying" to make it through... Its just Living like this is awful!

 

[mary1979]

It is you are right :(

Those days of looking at those with seemingly normal, uncomplicated and happy live are tough.

I try to avoid fb and other social media when I'm that depressed.

I wish I had words that take it all away.
I do not.
But it will get better.
Will always get better, because how you feel now is as bad as it gets.
Only way from here is up.
Lifes a continual ebb and flow, hang onto that xxx

 

[Stickler]

...That's my normal operation level these days.

Though my experience is that healing attempts are not optional.

 

[joeylittle]

I have a plan for "if I need it"

The level of detail and the access to the means are two important factors in determining whether a plan is rooted in ideation or intent.

Either way, it's not a great thing to have rattling around in your head - but, if you believe your thoughts around this to be detailed, then I'd consider it a strong warning sign.

 

[EveHarrington]

Recognition like this is a good thing because it means you can become proactive about changing things before you hit absolute rock bottom.

It's also good that you posted.

Do you know of anything that could possibly help you in this moment?