Anxiety Overload and Coping

[SeekingAfrica]

I am having extremely hard time today. The past few days were filled with practical anxiety(from things occuring at the moment) and today I woke up feeling off. Like I have no will or ability to will myself into doing anything. From the 10min tasks to longer ones, from what 'should' be done(regular work, chores) to what I want to get to(tasks bringing me towards goals and better future). It's like the last days have removed my backbone and everything from my todo list is on my mind, and I know it needs to get done, but I feel anxious and depressed in waves and I just have a hard time feeling like anything is a must.

I still planned to do list for the day(doing my best to keep it short) but I haven't done much the last hours. It's like I reached the limit of-- I am not sure-- and I am just out of any will to do anything. And for practical reasons I can't indulge in the things that would make me feel better. And I am trying to find something, inspiration, new planning system that makes me excited briefly so I can push through this day, but I am having a really HARD time. My chest is constantly constrained, and all I want to do is curl under several blankets and cry. My goals seem to far to reach and my present seems extremely uninspiring. I need to turn this around,I have to, so I can reach future with less moments like this one, but today that seems so impossible... I know it's not, I know from experience and I am trying to remind myself that right now experience matters more than my emotions, because they are unreliable right now, but it's a hard day.

I used to have days like this a lot, thankfully not anymore. But I guess today is a proof it still happens. I just need to feel something good today, somehow. Maybe journal and draw, or seek... something, I don't know. I need to feel excited for something. I need to push myself to do at least some things. I highlighted few items from the todo list, in case I can only do 3 or 4, to know which. It doesn't feel like anything matters right now, but again, trying to rely on logic rather than feeling. It feels like my mental health is blasting a red alarm today and I need a self-care day, but all the practical stuff still need to get done, and all I want is something to inspire me so I can do it all. For now...I'm just trying to push through.

 

[bowiesmom]

I hate anxiety. I'm also overwhelmed today. Small steps. Deep breathing. Hoping you (and me) make it through.

 

[mlj6019]

I can relate to that lack of motivation to do anything. There is so much to do and I just sit and look at it. I don’t know why I can’t get up and start doing “something.” It’s frustrating to say the least. I think it is a good thing tho that you realize that experience matters more than your emotions and that they are unreliable at times. You mentioned journaling, I find when I take time to write down feelings, emotions, desires, anger, sadness, hate, whatever, it seems to be an outlet for me to release and let go of some of that crap that builds up inside. I like that you make a to do list. Perhaps you could reduce it for now and instead of having 3-4 things on it, you can break it down to 1 or 2 each day and build from there. I wish you the best and keep pushing forward.