Attachment Issues

[Pencil]

I do this so

Do you print from here MO? And does your T read it in the session?

 

[JustBe]

Yes, I edit out the forum stuff and send it in an email.

 

[Nighthawk]

Ok well I as you know understand the Ja well no fine. Sy maak my haat wat fende meisie wat geleef het is gedoen.Ek waardeer dit dat jy lees saam. But as my existing therapist would say stay with it and stop changing the topic.:eek:

 

[Pencil]

Okay ;). (Of course I know you understand 'ja-nee' and 'ja well no fine', otherwise I wouldn't have used it. Wonder when last you heard these untranslatable expressions.)

If you come back and read the entire thread you'll notice that I said that I suspect more trauma survivors have attachment issues, as well as structural dissociation issues, without being aware of it. And I do suspect that it is not adequately addressed. BUT I could be completely wrong, of course.

What I do know it that my attachment problems went under the radar until one sharp therapist, who wouldn't work with me :roflmao:, pointed it out in the last 6 months!

 

[Pencil]

send it in an email.

And how often do you do this? I think it's great.

 

[Abstract]

Pencil,
From what I understand everyone with complex trauma has attachment problems. As well as many many people without trauma. And according to the structural dissociation model everyone with PTSD has structural dissociation.

On top of that many people have less cooperation between the normal ego states that everyone has (the parts that every single person has - there is no such thing as a single personality) than is ideal. The basics (child, adult, parent) and all the other roles that are there too. And then splitting (as in good and bad splitting rather than personality splitting) can be so intense for some that that can feel like an EP too.

From reading a lot of this last stuff I am really not sure my thoughts on all this and the attachment stuff (that I was going to post) will be useful for you. I think it's may be better I don't. :) Maybe you need to continue doing what you are doing and finding the way you want to approach this.

 

[Pencil]

From what I understand everyone with complex trauma has attachment problems

Abstract, I'm glad you're saying this, because this is what I think, but didn't want to make a statement that someone could decide might just be controversial.

From reading a lot of this last stuff I am really not sure my thoughts on all this and the attachment stuff (that I was going to post) will be useful for you. I think it's may be better I don't. :) Maybe you need to continue doing what you are doing and finding the way you want to approach this.

Please, please, please don't do this. I'm trying to find my way here, and what you have to say doesn't have to 100% correct and valid, and replace all else, to be meaningful. I've been alone and lost with this for a long time, and so the very fact that I can express this, and get feedback, is immensely meaningful to me.

 

[Abstract]

I am truly happy to Pencil but I don't want to upset you as I think a lot of this is very sensitive and painful for you. That this is vulnerable stuff for you. As long as you feel OK with me putting more of a "to- do" perspective then I shall put it out there for your consideration! ;)

Oh and I don't think it is such a controversial (the EP) concept really if we look at what they are saying. In my mind what they are saying is that EP's are pockets of trauma. All of us with PTSD know we have pockets of trauma as when we stumble on them we are triggered in one way or the other. I do think other things can still be linked to ego states though.

And I also don't believe structural dissociation is universally accepted. Although I have to say that a lot of it makes sense and feels right to me. Although I probably view it a little differently to how you and Springer view it.

 

[Pencil]

You'll notice that I liked the last post, but not the previous :) So please post, although it might IRK me :roflmao: Just kidding, I think I understand you better now.

 

[JustBe]

And how often...

I usually see her every two weeks except for this past couple of months when I've been busy with family issues. So I send her an update every week or two.

I think this really helped with my application for disability as well because my Therapist had all the documentation needed to write a letter on my behalf.

 

[Pencil]

Although I probably view it a little differently to how you and Springer view it.

This might be because you experience it differently. Springer and I are comparing notes and trying to find a language, or map or representation for what we can only sense and feel. And we don't sense and feel the same, but there is a 'sense' of what the other feels (Springer, I'm talking on your behalf here, you may disagree with me.) I've noticed on the 'Is Dissociation Universal' thread that people experience it differently. So for me it is not theoretical, but something that is slapping me around, sent me down the rabbit hole and gave me panic attacks six months ago. For me it is a mixture of attachment, the EP that is acting up, and the physical issue - and it is all coming together now for the first time in my life. I can now start making sense of it all.

Phew, I'm getting carried away.

 

[Abstract]

e controversial.

Oops. Realised I thought you meant the structural dissociation issue rather than attachment.

I actually don't think it's controversial either. Noone who has grown up with repeated trauma can develop secure attachment - that is what I have read. And I believe I have seen that repeated trauma in adulthood that is such that it causes complex trauma (complex PTSD/ disorder of extreme stress) also results in attachment issues or possibly is predisposed partly because of already existing attachment issues.