Can you push yourself too hard in therapy?

[Moniq]

Is there a such thing as sharing too soon or is this just the effects of sharing? Last week I shared something with my therapist and I am not sure that I was ready. I was frustrated with my lack of progress and inability to speak that I forced my self to talk about some things. I could not stop shaking even afterwards, I could not sleep that night, and haven’t slept well. None of my self care tools have worked. I went numb for a while now I don’t know what I am feeling. I feel as if I am grasping to keep it together. I don’t have the words. I don’t want to go back to the therapist, I am dreading it and want to cancel. I want to forget it and not talk about. Not certain if this is part of the process or a consequence of pushing. If it is the latter how to fix it? If it is the former how to get through it?

 

[Kubash16]

I know this all too well. I’m not sure which it is. But don’t cancel, talk to your therapist about what you are feeling about it.

 

[Missycat]

Please dont cancel, talk to your therapist. They will be used to dealing with this and will be able to support you.

 

[hopefully optimistic]

Um, I’ve done this a few times through email with my T. And now can email afterwards and say-oh, and FYI, I don’t want to come to our next appointment because I have said too much. Which, honestly, is really hard to say, because then I can’t fake how much I am bothered by what I’ve told her. But my T gets it, and always says that she hopes I don’t cancel, but it’s up to me, and even if I do cancel, she’s there for me. I always show up. Showing up is the hardest. And usually that day we don’t go into much depth about anything, and I leave feeling slightly better.

Show up. It may be the hardest thing you’ve done in awhile, but show up. Progress won’t be made by staying home and canceling.

 

[Friday]

Yes & Yes.

You can push yourself too hard in therapy.

You can expect a symptom spike to be a normal side effect of therapy. Especially in the beginning, and when doing any kind of trauma processing.

If it helps? Think of trauma therapy like physical therapy. It’s going to hurt a lot in the beginning. Hurting isn’t wrong, it’s a necessary part of rehabbing an injury. You can also push yourself too hard, and reinjure yourself. In both physical therapy/physio & psychotherapy being honest with how much it hurts is pretty key so that your therapist and slow you down when necessary, and cheerleader when necessary. Hiding or quitting? Might feel better in the short term, but you’ll be in a lot more pain long term & gimpy for no reason.

 

[whiteraven]

Absolutely.

 

[Freida]

yep. used to do it all the time because I wanted this crap done! But. Ptsd works on in it's own timezone no matter what I want. Therapy drives me nuts because it sometimes seems to move so slowly I forget I'm making improvements. Don't cancel your appointment -- how you are feeling is totally normal. :hug:

 

[shimmerz]

Absolutely you can. My therapist from years back, my first one, when I didn’t know anything about trauma, used to say that I was pushing so hard I could very easily have made myself go into psychotic state. Most of my healing has been about learning how not to push myself beyond my limits. That includes in the therapy sessions.

My current TV when I’m on a roll, will remind me that that’s enough. I’ve taught myself that when she says that regardless of whether I believe her or not or understand what she’s saying that I need to stop.

 

[grit]

IMHO, and for your healing practice, it is OK to feel like this sometimes that is being a human. If you do not want to talk about it, just say you know I am not ready to talk about the issue I brought up last time, A good decent human, let alone a professional therapist, will allow and understand.
By bringing up and requesting not to talk about it is part of the healing insuch that it shows a) you have feelings and aware of them and express them. b) you are open to continuity of therapy issue since you bring it back but respectfully requested to table it for now. c) no matter you think you were not ready, you were otherwise, you would not bring it up.

so I hope you start to feel good about your own recovery and being able to be here and now enough to converse about it.

Canceling the therapist now is kind of childish,another form of trauma symptom so do not cancel but request to postpone the discussion when you are again ready - this is normal adult version.

 

[piratelady]

I’ve been in this same position. I revealed quite a bit and had a pretty bad symptom spike. I reached out and my therapist actually got me in sooner. Then we were able to talk about my feelings in regards to what I shared and by the end of the appointment I was feeling a lot calmer about it so we could process what I shared at a later time.

 

[Moniq]

Thank you all. I will at least show up and see how that goes.

 

[NightSky]

It’s a vulnerability hangover. I feel what you describe often when I share things that cause me shame. And in three years of therapy I’ve shared quite a bit that causes that reaction. I’ve also been honest about how I was feeling after, whether in a follow up email or in session. Sharing remains difficult and I still struggle with not being able to sleep, feeling exposed, wanting to run... but my T has always been reassuring and caring, so I’ve learned to expect this reaction but to share anyway. It’s the only way forward. You’ll find the lines to stay within as you continue to show up and be honest.