So my USAF PTSD sufferer went into his shut down mode, not so much isolation mode, because we haven't gone a day without texting or talking or both, since March. His cup overflowed and March has always been a bad month for him. I got him to agree to go to therapy which no one else has ever done. I'm actually the only person he's ever shared this with.
He's gone sporadically but I think he has quit because it was making him face his issues and it was too. At the beginning he ended our relationship, same as last March.
He says he isn't ready for an "in depth" relationship, mind you after being together almost 2 years, living together 8 months and buying an engagement ring blah blah blah. So he has kept me around and lately is going hot and cold. He gets extremely angry at me but says he wants to be friends, yet I am the only "friend" he treats this way. My therapist says it's because they push away the once they love the most bc they feel so horrible about themselves and don't want us to go down with them.
His family and friends say he's always happy around them but he's able to ignore everything with them since they don't know what he's going thru. He said he wanted to start dating slow and see what happens. Then all of a sudden changes his mind because he says if we date slow we both know it will end up where we were. Well, DUH, that should tell you it's meant to be. But I understand his thoughts aren't completely rational right now.
So all that rambling to say, is it safe in this situation to go to the dating "No Comtact Rule" or will it drive him nuts. We argued last Thursday and I told him I'd had enough and to not contact me until he could talk civilly. He has still called and texted each day. I take hours to read and or reply.
Any insight here would be great. I've read that this no contact rule works wonderfully but I don't want to further push him into the pit he is in.
He came over today with the engagement ring and told me to return it and take the money for me. I said I wouldn't do that at all bc it would hurt too much. He put it in his pocket and said he will keep it for "down the road". I know he still loves me and is just pushing those emotions way down right now.
What should I do? Any thing is helpful.
He's gone sporadically but I think he has quit because it was making him face his issues and it was too. At the beginning he ended our relationship, same as last March.
He says he isn't ready for an "in depth" relationship, mind you after being together almost 2 years, living together 8 months and buying an engagement ring blah blah blah. So he has kept me around and lately is going hot and cold. He gets extremely angry at me but says he wants to be friends, yet I am the only "friend" he treats this way. My therapist says it's because they push away the once they love the most bc they feel so horrible about themselves and don't want us to go down with them.
His family and friends say he's always happy around them but he's able to ignore everything with them since they don't know what he's going thru. He said he wanted to start dating slow and see what happens. Then all of a sudden changes his mind because he says if we date slow we both know it will end up where we were. Well, DUH, that should tell you it's meant to be. But I understand his thoughts aren't completely rational right now.
So all that rambling to say, is it safe in this situation to go to the dating "No Comtact Rule" or will it drive him nuts. We argued last Thursday and I told him I'd had enough and to not contact me until he could talk civilly. He has still called and texted each day. I take hours to read and or reply.
Any insight here would be great. I've read that this no contact rule works wonderfully but I don't want to further push him into the pit he is in.
He came over today with the engagement ring and told me to return it and take the money for me. I said I wouldn't do that at all bc it would hurt too much. He put it in his pocket and said he will keep it for "down the road". I know he still loves me and is just pushing those emotions way down right now.
What should I do? Any thing is helpful.
