Gs172003
Diamond Member
A large population didn't vote at all. Then there were the goofy write ins. " harambe?" Really?
But again....I pray he's a different man then he portrayed himself to be.
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Other Coping After The Us Election.
- Post starter EveHarrington
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But again....I pray he's a different man then he portrayed himself to be.
scout86
VIP Member
I'm not holding out much hope that you get the answer you're looking for with that prayer, but the site I took that info from included write-in votes and I lumped them together with the smaller parties.
Chitoshi
Gold Member
I will say, I cried when the election results came in. I felt unsafe, and my boyfriend almost called off of work because it was so hard. My therapist told me he had lots of phone calls on Wednesday for crises.
It's real, and honestly I'm so upset from what I've been hearing. I'm hispanic, I look white, though. I used to start going out for walks, but I live in an apartment complex and from the shouting I've heard around my complex I don't feel safe going for walks by myself anymore, even with mace. This whole climate has taken a big toll on my recovery, I think. My T tells me that it'll pass, and it's good I'm protecting myself, that I'm good at protecting myself, but this was all too much.
My dog isn't doing well, I found out my grandmother has lung cancer (we're not sure what stage), I'm in the middle of my finals week, and now I don't feel like I can safely walk my own streets or interact with guys (by this I mean say "hello" while walking past someone) in public areas. The world has definitely become an unsafe place for me again, and I feel crushed that I've been set back.
My current coping strategies are to keep going to school, keep going to my practicum (basically internship) site because what else am I supposed to do? I've been trying to do breathing exercises, reframing, and do some hobbies.
I started walking to clear my head, but I'm at a loss now because I'm scared to leave my apartment because I feel like I'm an object again. It took me a long time to get out of the "I'm an object" state of mind.
I've read through other replies, and I like cooking food, so maybe I'll try that. I'm not sure who said they were making au gratin potatoes, but I love that idea.
Does anyone else have any other coping skills I can use, maybe?
It's real, and honestly I'm so upset from what I've been hearing. I'm hispanic, I look white, though. I used to start going out for walks, but I live in an apartment complex and from the shouting I've heard around my complex I don't feel safe going for walks by myself anymore, even with mace. This whole climate has taken a big toll on my recovery, I think. My T tells me that it'll pass, and it's good I'm protecting myself, that I'm good at protecting myself, but this was all too much.
My dog isn't doing well, I found out my grandmother has lung cancer (we're not sure what stage), I'm in the middle of my finals week, and now I don't feel like I can safely walk my own streets or interact with guys (by this I mean say "hello" while walking past someone) in public areas. The world has definitely become an unsafe place for me again, and I feel crushed that I've been set back.
My current coping strategies are to keep going to school, keep going to my practicum (basically internship) site because what else am I supposed to do? I've been trying to do breathing exercises, reframing, and do some hobbies.
I started walking to clear my head, but I'm at a loss now because I'm scared to leave my apartment because I feel like I'm an object again. It took me a long time to get out of the "I'm an object" state of mind.
I've read through other replies, and I like cooking food, so maybe I'll try that. I'm not sure who said they were making au gratin potatoes, but I love that idea.
Does anyone else have any other coping skills I can use, maybe?
Gs172003
Diamond Member
Ah gotcha. We'll have to see what happens. I'm not sure how to feel.
K
Kevmac
I Have felt triggered as well as it is difficult to deal with the fact that someone who used bullying as his tactic and is accused of raping a 13 year old has won. I am trying to be as good to myself as possible these weeks. Please do the same. Extra yoga, therapy. At the moment I have stopped caring about the ills of the world and I am focused on getting healthy. I hope this is the way to go.
Good luck. You are not alone
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@joeylittle thank you for your thoughtful reply. I was not able to articulate exactly how and why the idea that accepting sexual assault and the attitudes that support it as "nothing new" bothered me so. You expressed that well.
The scary and disturbing part for me is that it is nothing new. It's so deeply embedded in our culture that I still struggle with guilt/blame/shame etc for being the VICTIM of violent sexual assault. I still keep silent about my assailants who remain in my community and share mutual friends. I have had the experience of formerly close female friends DEFNDING my perpetrators.
I think it's that context that's most upsetting for me. That we can ignore Trumps violence against women, reminds me how easy it was for my school/community/peer group to excuse the behavior of the boys who assaulted me.
I am also optimistic that unmasking and talking about this ugliness that "has always been" is a way to start the healing. However I feel threatened by those it has emboldened. Online I have been getting a lot more replies to political posts such as "you just wish someone would grab your pussy like Trump does" actually, no. Having had my pussy grabbed without consent I'd prefer that never happen again!
The scary and disturbing part for me is that it is nothing new. It's so deeply embedded in our culture that I still struggle with guilt/blame/shame etc for being the VICTIM of violent sexual assault. I still keep silent about my assailants who remain in my community and share mutual friends. I have had the experience of formerly close female friends DEFNDING my perpetrators.
I think it's that context that's most upsetting for me. That we can ignore Trumps violence against women, reminds me how easy it was for my school/community/peer group to excuse the behavior of the boys who assaulted me.
I am also optimistic that unmasking and talking about this ugliness that "has always been" is a way to start the healing. However I feel threatened by those it has emboldened. Online I have been getting a lot more replies to political posts such as "you just wish someone would grab your pussy like Trump does" actually, no. Having had my pussy grabbed without consent I'd prefer that never happen again!
Eve, I really hope you feel better soon.
I can't claim the level of personal effect that most do here as I am on a different continent and that I am sure buffers things greatly. I can sympathise and am thinking of others here. I do see this from a trauma perspective rather than a political one. Its interesting to see it from a bit of a distance as well. Really helpful for me to understand previous reactions and helps me feel less ashamed and alone in those.
Not that I don't care about the political or moral. I do of course. In fact my politics are central and not left. Most importantly I understand the impact of certain things and how they can send us off in a way different place than we would find ourselves in from a purely moral or political perspective.
When Trump first became popular I found myself there and then when the sexual stuff came up but before that I have had various things affect me very strongly and can totally sympathise with those who are affected by this so severely.
When Jimmy Saville stuff came out by the end there was a tiny hope in me that started believing that people (the general public) would learn and listen and do something when people display certain traits. He waved them under everyones noses and they just looked away and there was a lot of press coverage looking at why that happened. There is still a bit. It was horrible but part of it felt corrective to me.
And then various things came up. Bill Cosby really got me. Then something knocked me right over and it was Jeremy Clarkson from Drive Time of all things. I still don't fully understand why. I think it was the level of public support he got after. The petitions reached 1065 000 wanting to reinstate him. My father had that quality of being able to charm people. Of getting away with things. Entertainment value. Trump apparently has that (not for me!!).
The Jeremy Clarkson thing was educational for me. I came to the conclusion that it was purely about self interest. People seem to ignore and excuse abusive behaviour when it serves them in some way. They wanted their television programme you know! A weekly watch of that was more important than anything happening to someone else. It looks like thats what is happening with Trump here. People have something they want for their own lives and abusive behaviour is discounted as a less important factor. I suspect that;s the case with the bigotry and other stuff too. But when we are suffering from trauma symptoms and the effects of these on our lives then people looking away or seemingly condoning it can be awful. I know it doesn't affect all but that's the nature of this stuff. What affects one doesn't neccesarily affect the next person. Lots of us with this though as is evident by this thread.
Totally with those who discuss the ick reaction to it all.
I haven't read the last pages of this thread so going to catch up now.
I can't claim the level of personal effect that most do here as I am on a different continent and that I am sure buffers things greatly. I can sympathise and am thinking of others here. I do see this from a trauma perspective rather than a political one. Its interesting to see it from a bit of a distance as well. Really helpful for me to understand previous reactions and helps me feel less ashamed and alone in those.
Not that I don't care about the political or moral. I do of course. In fact my politics are central and not left. Most importantly I understand the impact of certain things and how they can send us off in a way different place than we would find ourselves in from a purely moral or political perspective.
When Trump first became popular I found myself there and then when the sexual stuff came up but before that I have had various things affect me very strongly and can totally sympathise with those who are affected by this so severely.
When Jimmy Saville stuff came out by the end there was a tiny hope in me that started believing that people (the general public) would learn and listen and do something when people display certain traits. He waved them under everyones noses and they just looked away and there was a lot of press coverage looking at why that happened. There is still a bit. It was horrible but part of it felt corrective to me.
And then various things came up. Bill Cosby really got me. Then something knocked me right over and it was Jeremy Clarkson from Drive Time of all things. I still don't fully understand why. I think it was the level of public support he got after. The petitions reached 1065 000 wanting to reinstate him. My father had that quality of being able to charm people. Of getting away with things. Entertainment value. Trump apparently has that (not for me!!).
One of my reoccurring trauma nightmares is about being attacked by multiple people in a car and onlookers ignoring my screams for help. And then running and having it happen again and again but each time people watching and ignoring. The looking away or seeming approval of the public of abusive behaviours of all types gets right into my bones and I react strongly to it. Its very painful. And it sets off my symptoms every time. I get that screaming into the empty air feeling. Like being a ghost
The Jeremy Clarkson thing was educational for me. I came to the conclusion that it was purely about self interest. People seem to ignore and excuse abusive behaviour when it serves them in some way. They wanted their television programme you know! A weekly watch of that was more important than anything happening to someone else. It looks like thats what is happening with Trump here. People have something they want for their own lives and abusive behaviour is discounted as a less important factor. I suspect that;s the case with the bigotry and other stuff too. But when we are suffering from trauma symptoms and the effects of these on our lives then people looking away or seemingly condoning it can be awful. I know it doesn't affect all but that's the nature of this stuff. What affects one doesn't neccesarily affect the next person. Lots of us with this though as is evident by this thread.
Totally with those who discuss the ick reaction to it all.
I haven't read the last pages of this thread so going to catch up now.
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The Albatross
VIP Member
Zoogal is correct, approximately 100 million or so eligible voters stayed home/didn't bother to cast a vote. The Republican turn out stayed about the same from 2008 through 2016 and for the Democrat party about 9-10 million stayed home by the turn out from 2008 and 2016. There is actually, no "mandate" for the President elect and that I think is probably good for everybody. I didn't like him either - he was not my party candidate of choice - but he/his staff knows that he will have to have bipartisan efforts just because of what I stated above. There is no "mandate" for the Republicans.
I deal with stuff rationally and with a bit of logic. I thought maybe it would help those on the thread to see here, that the reality of what happened in this election cycle was that since 2008 of those who participated/voted in 2008 - a large number for whatever reason didn't or couldn't vote for either candidate. And... Democrats themselves vote was down 9-10 million which tipped the election. It is a matter of conjecture at this time why that happened.
I've been watching the real numbers since the election... but honestly, the info I give here might help some. In 4 years or less even if Trump does something impeachable we'll be doing it all over again.
I deal with stuff rationally and with a bit of logic. I thought maybe it would help those on the thread to see here, that the reality of what happened in this election cycle was that since 2008 of those who participated/voted in 2008 - a large number for whatever reason didn't or couldn't vote for either candidate. And... Democrats themselves vote was down 9-10 million which tipped the election. It is a matter of conjecture at this time why that happened.
I've been watching the real numbers since the election... but honestly, the info I give here might help some. In 4 years or less even if Trump does something impeachable we'll be doing it all over again.
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lostforgottensoul
VIP Member
No, that's not what I meant, though i suppose it read that way.
I am in no way ok at all about it being shrugged about and yes my morals as well are very bothered about it. And i was triggered and freaking out, until i realized it has always been this way and this is just a larger scale example.
So i am not ok with it. That wasnt what i was trying to say. I was trying to express a way to frame it to help those that are very triggered over it is all.
Gs172003
Diamond Member
Part of that was alot of people put too much stock in prior "poll" numbers. I watched a young co-worker using one the day of the election. It had Hillary winning by a landslide...70%-30% so my guess is quite a few didn't think theirs was needed. But... Obviously that was waaay off.
lostforgottensoul
VIP Member
Yes, that too.
I also stayed home and couldn't vote.
But thats only true if they vote.
I think (not sure, just my opinion) those that sat home were like me, just couldn't vote any of them. Voting means, to me, that you agree with them. But, remember many vote for the opponent so the other doesn't get in. That was very alive and apparent this election. So those voters weren't voting for Trump (and sexual assult) but against Clinton. Another way to frame it differently.
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