Fear of therapy ending?

[EveHarrington]

So maybe we should focus on reality checking?

Maybe run down scenarios of a game plan to have just in case therapy does end?

What are the chances of therapy ending soon?

Could you reality check this with your therapist?

Could you ask her if she thinks she will be able to work with you long term?

If therapy does end, what can you do to make things better? A game plan for finding additional support? Maybe look up new therapists now so you can see that additional help is out there? (I have done this, and save screenshots of their profiles in my phone.)

For me, knowing what could happen, and then having a game plan for the worst case scenario really helps. It says that I will be ok even if I lose my support, because other support is available.

 

[Deleted member 37474]

I hate this thread because it is my biggest fear. That my T will leave. Or that I won’t be ready to leave when it is time. I do tell myself that there was one day that I felt normal. Very normal and I glanced at my therapist in my mind and didn’t need her. Felt like “wow, if I could maintain this “normal” therapy ending won’t feel tragic.”

 

[Freida]

My t is deploying in 2019 for 9 months and I'm already undone about it. She says she will try to Skype but she will be on active duty and not thru the va so she may not be able to. She tells me we will spend time before then working by on my coping skills until she gets back.....but......

 

[KwanYingirl]

@Snowflake losing my therapist is a fear I visit now and then. I do discuss it with him. He has always encouraged me to develop relationships with other healers of my choice. They’re not psychologists, but energy and spiritual guides. A major challenge for me that is still ongoing and one that I wonder if I’ll ever conquer is to replace fear with faith. The same lesson I had to learn to get sober. That if I were to fall into an abyss, that I would sprout wings (metaphorically speaking).

My therapist has a very healthy and stable ego who really gets that healing is a multidimensional process, and putting all my eggs in one basket is not in my best interest. I work with a Shaman and reiki master who has helped me at least consider faith as an option. She spent 2 weeks in England studying using reiki to support people with PTSD. I used to go once a month, but when she got back, she said every two weeks is better for PTSD and it has been. Just my experience, but loss is very, very difficult for me.

 

[rosey]

I ended therapy a month ago, was my decision based on needing a long break to put plans into action and know I can go it alone. Has been hard not in terms of not talking but missing the therapist. We have had a few email exchanges which have helped and some lovely words of reflection of the time from her which were very validating. I miss the therapist but not the therapy so know it was a good decision.

I think you know when the time is right to end so until then maybe try not to worry about it.

 

[Snowflake]

My t is deploying in 2019 for 9 months and I'm already undone about it. She says she will try to Skype...

Ugh

 

[blackemerald1]

I asked my psych when he was going to retire a few weeks ago because I had a panic attack over it during a session. It must have been rumbling around in my head & I blurted it out. Took the whole session for me to settle down - waste of good time for other stuff. He's not retiring.

Then I want to give it up so I can avoid him leaving. How silly is that?

I tried no therapy for one year, ended up in hospital. So I think that reinforced my fear?
Idk, I am managing ok, sort of.. but is it only because I have therapy or am I really doing ok? I don't know what normal is anymore. I don't think I will even know when I am normal enough & I don't want to go back to hospital.
So yes I wonder too.

 

[Snowflake]

I asked my psych when he was going to retire a few weeks ago because I had a panic attack over it...

I have thought about giving up too —to avoid them leaving or ending therapy.

 

[blackemerald1]

@Snowflake I know... it's an irrational idea that I get because well I'm scared of not having the one person in the whole world who knows how I think, what's happened to me & wants to help.

Is it a form of self destructive thinking?

 

[Snowflake]

@Snowflake I know... it's an irrational idea that I get because well I'm scared...

I’m sure it is. I’m terrified of not having that one person. And she has given me no indication of therapy ending anytime soon

 

[James McGregor]

I think it depends, here in the UK therapy tends to end when a certain number of sessions have been reached, or the therapsts workload has reached a certain point, very little to do with whether it's actually a good time or not . Therapists often admit this too. So more anger than afraid, but the fear does follow knowing your still unwell. It's just how it is here, and unless you can pay to go private in the UK, your pretty much f*cked

 

[Emotional girl]

I live in the UK as well and as James has said on the NHS we get no choice in to when our sessions end.For me because of a past experience in therapy I find endings really hard to deal with,I am about to finish soon with my present T and I am dreading it.