Fiance Doesn't Believe Me.

[C.J]

Last June after my second stay in hospital my fiance broke off our engagement because I didn't tell him about the sexual abuse that happened to me. He doesn't believe me because it was a mutual friend and he says I should of told him when it first started happening.... I was in denial and didn't tell anyone for 3 years.... I am so hurt and confused.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Hi CJ. I am so sorry that your fiancé broke things off with you. I hate to say it, but your fiancé is an arse who doesn't deserve you since he has decided to believe a friend over you. Yes, you can do better.

 

[Mercy]

Yes, of course, you are hurt and confused. I guess he is too.

Don't be too hard on yourself. Many people can't speak about a rape for 10 or more years. I'm sad for you that speaking up has turned you fiance away. Although speaking your truth had a sad effect, it is still important to speak up.

There will be someone, when you are ready, who will love you and accept your pain. A man with different gifts who can meet your needs much better. Also, please don't think that rape makes you unloveable, even if that's what your ex-fiance acted that way. He is so wrong. It's just not true. Rape is an act of violence not even lust. Finding a PTSD therapist to talk out loud with might be good.

 

[atthree]

Hi CJ, this is my first time here. I've had PTSD sense 3, not knowing what was different about me. If a person isn't able to understand or forgive me, I moved on. This is before me knowing I had PTSD.

This world is a better place with me in it. How else are people going to learn.

PS: Is it ok to say God Bless?

 

[radicalgratitude]

Hi C.J, ironically, I am quite happy that all this unfolded because it doesn't sound like your fiance was husband material, so I'm happy for you, even though I know it doesn't feel good right now. :(

I pray that you find someone who is a wonderful guy!