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Groceries in the time of covid

Thread starter #25
If everyone followed the damn rules, it would be easier.
This is how I feel when I am shopping. Earlier today, a woman got within 3 feet of me going against the arrows in an aisle. I quickly turned and walked away. I was clearly annoyed but what do you do? Maybe next time, she'll wait or not. Either way, she stopped being in my space and that was what I needed. It's really frustrating.
What's frustrating is that before if someone was in my personal space I would usually try and push past my fear and make them uncomfortable because I was there first and they can get their milk when I'm done or whatever the case may be, let them feel discomfort, too, but in the times we are in I feel like I'm legitimately worried about my own safety. So turns out those without regard for others, or who don't believe this is serious and anxiety producing for people, end up just being able to be pushy because ultimately I feel like a can of beans isn't worth it.

Also, I forgot who wrote it but I second the "weird concotions" until I literally cannot make a balanced meal anymore because I am also doing that.

You know what has been helping immensely? A meal plan. I make a list of like 10 meals I rotate and can make a pretty robust list then I just live off the leftovers for lunch. It also has been expediting our shopping trips so my husband doesn't have to be in there as fast, and we go to the same grocery store so as long as I sort the list by category he can be in and out in less than 20 minutes.
But a kerbside pickup would be a prostitute.
Why am I the only person here who sees the damned arrows???
I honestly can’t see them unless I stop every few feet and look down. It’s a high cheekbones, thing. Wih my mask on, everyhing below the bridge of my nose is totally obscured, and far enough ahead to see the floor? The lights reflecting off of the polished whatever-the-hell-they-pave-the-floors-with turn it all into one giant homogenous glare.

My mother refuses to shop with me, now, because I’m constantly going down empty aisles the “wrong” way, and refusing to get in line the “right” way. Um. My aisle is empty. You’re waiting 10 minutes to go down a crowded aisle because... it’s not safer? Common sense, mom!!! Don’t trail along in the wake of germy people >.< Thats the other thing with the arrows, in this area. The aisles aren’t wide enough to pass, so you have to wait for everyone to get their shopping done, before you can move forward. My mom and I can both go to the store, for the same 5 things, I’m done in 2 minutes, never closer than 25 feet away from someone, & out. An hour later and I’m texting here “Where the f*ck are you??? Did I miss you leave?” Nope. She’s still in there. 1 carts distance from the person in front of her. Now in line to check out. Madness. Mom! Sense! Common, reasoned, acquired, I don’t care which!!! Stop breathing the germy people.
BUT I'm sure that curbside pickup is here to stay and that picking out grapefruits in the middle of a crowd isn't a high level skill in real life.
I’ve been getting 90% of my groceries delivered for YEARS. The only places I went in-person were the ethnic markets (it’s arguable that 90% of my usual shopping was AT ethnic markets, but I got sick a few years ago and couldn’t even walk to the bathroom more than once a day, so for at least a few years now it’s all been by delivery).

Covid has actually driven me TO having to shop in person (ugh) because instead of 2 hour delivery? The system was so overloaded it was taking days (at best), or all delivery times full for weeks. Vexing.

So I went from a CSA box (community supported agriculture, where you get your produce directly from a cooperative of farms dropping a box off on your stoop once a week), daily milk/dairy/cheese delivery (again, directly from the farm, I looooove milkmen & their trucks tinkling with glass bottles moving up and down the streets at 4am!!!), Amazon dropping off all my branded goods (cokes to comet), and only dodging and weaving through crowds at the Asian/Indian/Latin/Dock markets... to having to buy EVERYTHING at the thrice cursed grocery store.

f*ck. The. Grocery. Store.

If I’m not haggling prices? There’s no need for me to be there.
I've been doing online grocery pick-up and CSA weekly produce boxes since way before covid was a thing. People who use scented products keep me out of public spaces. The various stank bombs, as I like to call them, make me ill for days and create a chance for heart palpitations and a-fib, and I'd rather not risk it, so I have to navigate everywhere very mindfully.

The cleaning aisles and scented candle displays are the worst. They spread that crap out on the end caps, too, so it's inescapable. I also get to avoid having to see and smell the dead animal carcasses, the nasty seafood smells, and the congealed bovine/goat mammary products and such that makes me gag and feel sad for the victims.

However, wearing a mask that I've soaked with my favoite diluted citrus scent (fractionated coconut oil and orange essential oil) is one way to get in and out with fewer smells, but the stank(s)/chemical concoctions stick to my hair and clothes, as well, so I have to shower as soon as I get home in hopes of not being made too sick vs. really sick. A pain in the ass.

If I need produce of some sort and don't feel comfortable leaving it up to their judgement, I call ahead after placing my order to specify what I want them to pick out for me. So far, no issues. Out of stock items during covid stuff, especially in the beginning, made it tricky to get what I ordered, but I'm the type of person to stay prepared for the "what-ifness" of most everything, so we were still fortunate enough to have what we truly needed.

It's also farmers' market season and most of them now have the option of ordering online, too, and doing a drive-by pick-up. Wild harvested mushrooms, locally made tofu, more greens varieties than I can count, etc. and all the things we love to fuel up with are in their prime right now. Reminding us how bland the typical grocery store options are once garden season ends. We're lucky to have so many options. It's been great, from my perspective.

We used instacart a couple times, but one of those times a smoker did the delivery and everything had the lingering cigarette smoke smell on it - and that's another thing that can make me ill for days (I quit 18 yrs ago). Plus, I noticed the groceries are a bit higher in price via their website compared to the online curbside pick-up prices - then paying the delivery fee, and tipping them on top of that. If I truly don't want to leave the house, it's a great option. But most days, when my mind and body are in sync and not experiencing lots of pain, I'd rather get out of the house and soak up the scenery and enjoy the entertainment of watching peeps from the parking lot.
Thread starter #30
“Where the f*ck are you??? Did I miss you leave?” Nope. She’s still in there.
😂 If I get nothing else from this discussion, I have regained enormous gratitude that I no longer take my mother shopping. God love her but I evaded covid completely and this was in the best interest of our continued relationship. This quote reminded me of the odd dilly-dally anxiety trips she would go on and disappear somewhere into the store only for me to have to try and locate her a half hour after I had finished even without a virus to be concerned with.

THANK YOU! Shopping could be a lot harder right now. I'm also kinda glad for you that your mother doesn't want to shop with you at the moment 😅. These are hard times made harder by dealing with other people - even those we like - that is for sure.

I'm still trying to convince myself that not shopping is alright. It seems that plenty of people are not. I guess I have pegged it as avoidance for so long that even with excellent reasons to avoid it, I have just been dragging myself through it like it is a necessary life skill that I can't let shrivel up and die. I used to order most everything but fresh stuff but all our recent moving made that a bit less convenient. We're going to be here at least another month, so maybe I need to get it together and start worrying more about my sanity and less about a skill set that I barely have that seems to be becoming outdated, anyway. If this were a job skill, I would let it go.
I think it refers to what we in the UK call the kerb
I love this. I was convinced that my copy of "Mrs. Dalloway" had a major typo on the 2nd page; I was 19. I thought I was so smart!!

The Asian markets near me are struggling still. People are still avoiding them. They have better produce than our typical "american" grocery store though. They're still a ghost town and I worry about them, so we are trying to shop there more for our basics.
I really want to head over to my old neighborhood. I assume my favorite spot is doing okay, but I haven't gone in since before covid, it's in the city very squished together. Some old markets where people did wear face masks on a daily basis, 20 years ago, fairly recent immigrants to the US forming some insular communities. (I was always investigating when food was involved!
I know the area in general was looted ........... They had a mural and a statue from previous generations that had to come down (They were UGLY anyway!). but I know my favorite spot is doing okay which is good. They took care of me there when I was tall and gangly and broke, including My Summer of Asian Noodle Soup. There's also a grocery I'd love to give business too.

As to the original post - I've been going out about once a week, and I use it go to to the grocery store. I'm not a fan but I've actually been told I should for my mental health and I am taking it. Though I wear masks and social distance as MUST be done in my area. Everyone follows the arrows and stays 6 feet apart! Still, the grocery store yesterday was so much more calm than it was just 2 weeks ago. People were more kind. They weren't giving each other the side-eye about who had the nerve to pick up the last box of Eggo waffles or whatever random item was out of stock.
Thread starter #34
When you use something as a tool to keep yourself functional?
Yeah. The thing is that grocery shopping has always been that one thing that just about no matter what, I struggle to do. And because I am either highly masochistic or extremely stubborn, I have forced myself to do it in hopes that it would get a little easier and I would feel like I was functioning at a higher level. It has gotten a little easier. I don't have to shop at 3:00 in the morning, anymore.

I also pinned a lot of self-assessment scores on how well I was doing in the supermarket probably just because way back in the day a person's ability to make it through the lights, boxes and maze of carts was part of a psychiatric evaluation. I couldn't do it - that was part of what showed I was disabled.

It probably sounds daft but this could be a whole new era of self-appraisal for me. I don't think it ever fully occurred to me that not shopping was a reasonable option. Since it seems like it is, I may be doing a lot better than I have been thinking that I have been.
Thread starter #35
I am guessing that since most everyone is either minimizing their grocery shopping time or just basically doing away with it by picking up helpful prostitutes (AKA curbside pickup 😂) and having things delivered that maybe the fight just isn't worth it, anymore. I've held onto grocery shopping as a sort of ongoing mental health challenge but it seems the obstacle course has gotten out of hand. I was actually feeling a tad defeated but everyone's responses here indicates to me that I am expecting a little much from myself at this point. I will be shopping first thing in the morning tomorrow (with my headphones) but I am looking at other options for the near future.

Thank you all for helping me let myself off the hook on this. I can be a little slow to catch on at times.
Thread starter #36
I did grocery pick up today for the very first time. I have always shopped for at least produce before but since about half of our diet is produce, it's been a considerable amount of shopping. I got my produce and the peanut sauce they were out of last time.

It was so EASY!!!

Thanks again for letting me know that I wasn't letting my illness win by not continuing to shop in the store. That's going to significantly improve my quality of life. 😅
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