Have You Ever Looked Up Your T On Facebook?

[Lucycat]

Has your T checked you out on any Social media? How would you feel if he/ she said he had?

 

[desiderata310]

@Lucycat
He knows I have an account. He's seen evidence of it but the security is set so high on it all you can see is my name and profile pic. LOL

 

[seedling]

Yep, done all those things. Googled my providers, drive by the offices, I think it's a connection thing. I like to feel I am connected with people that understand my PTSD. People who have heard all my stuff.

 

[finding_my_way]

It's definitely a connection thing for me, too. mrsps, I was also embarrassed to mention it, but it became an elephant in the room that only I could see! It was more uncomfortable to not tell her. I was to curious what she would think of me and how she would react. So, I started telling her that sometimes I look her up online because I want to feel closer to her. I explained that I feel like I don't know her so it is hard to always trust her. And, I sent an e-mail listing everything I did find so that she would know before I had this discussion, before I had a chance to back out. She was un-phased. She was open and understood the awkwardness of this one-sided relationship. She didn't feel like I was stalking her or anything but just wanted me to feel more comfortable with her. It opened a lot of doors in our relationship, which has since grown immensely. So, maybe try writing it out for her and e-mailing/handing it to her so that you can't back down, and definitely evaluate the why of your searches. If it is for connection or whatever else, start with that: I feel like I need a way to connect to you when I am not in your office, and sometimes this helps.

 

[Hooper]

I checked mine out on Facebook for several reasons. I wanted to recognize her when we met. I also didn't want to have a bunch of mutual friends. It's pretty much a one way street as far as information flow so I wanted to know as much as I could before I went in. I told her I had checked her out as well and she was surprised her privacy settings allowed me to see what I did see. It didn't seem to bother her and I am harmless so it was a non issue. After 2 sessions she knows far more about me than I ever will her and it is going to keep going in that direction so it doesn't bother me in the slightest to take a look at what she offers to the public. I didn't come up with it but I read we are 3 people. We are who we think we are, who we portray ourselves to be to the public and who we really are. Facebook offers the portrayal but it's seldom accurate. At least it's a starting point and my T passed my bs meter. I'll get a better idea soon enough.

 

[mytai]

Has your T checked you out on any Social media? How would you feel if he/ she said he had?

I think before I my first ever appointment with my current T I googled her to look for reviews, and came across her LinkedIn profile. I checked it out, and then LinkedIn notified me that she had looked at my profile a few days after that. Didn't bother me, it was fair game. It caught me off guard that she had but it didn't bother me.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Mines wasn't on Facebook or anything but I did find her university thesis. It wasn't very impressive. :wideeyed::roflmao:

 

[GWhizz]

I did before but felt really bad for doing so and read up a bit about it because I felt like a stalker or something lol. But then I read about the different levels and it seems mine was only at a level of vigilance to ensure self-preservation.

I wouldn't do it often, just once off to see who I'm working with as we know nada about this person yet are expected to spill and share our most intimate life-details with them.

On another note, please rest assured that you can have that relationship or whatever you want. It's not about comparisons. My T gets surprised, given my past, that I'm so 'normal', a mother with a stable job and relationship. But it's because I believed I was worthy and capable of such things. My trauma has held me back enough, but I do my best to fight against it.

 

[Born to Run]

Has your T checked you out on any Social media? How would you feel if he/ she said he had?

I would not mind, but also hardly do social media. I told him my username on here, as the meaning of my username came up briefly in another context though. It is a matter of trust to me.