Natalialynnll
New Here
Hello. I'm well I could say victim, but I've made it through it all. So I'll say survived of multiple counts of child molestation, raped as an adult twice by a group of 6-8 men, child abuse and neglect as well as a few other things.
I finally found someone as strange as it sounds. Trusted maybe not fully but more then I've ever trusted anyone and I fell in love with him the second we met. I had an overwhelming feeling I was suppose to be with him..
Funny thing is I'm hyper sensitive. And he is completely the opposite. For the first few months he a would fly me out, we would have fun then he'd tell me I wasn't his type. I swear I fought every ounce of negative to make this real. I have my :( ya know, Lil. Quirks and moments I can't seem to control like I am constantly checking up on him. I'm always trying to look put for him and get angry, so angry when he acts like its not big deal or doesn't protect me .
I've gotten over a few things that have been lifelong but something's I can't seem to, he doesn't understand nor has ever even tried to. It seems as though and he admits to it and can't understand that when I need him he gets cold. When I have an episode he gets cold, ice cold and somehow I end up crying uncontrollably hours later, alone cold and scared.
He says he loves me, he wants this to work and says he's tried. Weird thing is if he's tried wouldn't that mean he'd take the time to read up on it get advice ect which he hasn't. My heart's broken and he said he can't deal with it anymore:(. I'm 30, two kids and he is the only one I loved. I've allowed myself love and trust and well :( idk what to do. Any advice?
I finally found someone as strange as it sounds. Trusted maybe not fully but more then I've ever trusted anyone and I fell in love with him the second we met. I had an overwhelming feeling I was suppose to be with him..
Funny thing is I'm hyper sensitive. And he is completely the opposite. For the first few months he a would fly me out, we would have fun then he'd tell me I wasn't his type. I swear I fought every ounce of negative to make this real. I have my :( ya know, Lil. Quirks and moments I can't seem to control like I am constantly checking up on him. I'm always trying to look put for him and get angry, so angry when he acts like its not big deal or doesn't protect me .
I've gotten over a few things that have been lifelong but something's I can't seem to, he doesn't understand nor has ever even tried to. It seems as though and he admits to it and can't understand that when I need him he gets cold. When I have an episode he gets cold, ice cold and somehow I end up crying uncontrollably hours later, alone cold and scared.
He says he loves me, he wants this to work and says he's tried. Weird thing is if he's tried wouldn't that mean he'd take the time to read up on it get advice ect which he hasn't. My heart's broken and he said he can't deal with it anymore:(. I'm 30, two kids and he is the only one I loved. I've allowed myself love and trust and well :( idk what to do. Any advice?
