How Did You Fair The Relationship Test?

[anthony]

So... I am curious as to peoples results from the [DLMURL="http://www.ptsdforum.org/mental-imagery.php"]relationship test[/DLMURL] (forms menu). Are you surprised, about right, totally unsure of the overall result?

 

[Nicolette]

Despite my husband being a thorn in my butt at times (lol) we have a healthy relationship based on my answers!

 

[Tiger Kitten]

It says my tree is going to get tired of me being a vine. That's pretty much what I expected. I am working on being a tree too though. :)

 

[Deleted member 541]

I think I screwed it up...LOL!!!!!! I tried to think of how much my daughter has grown, so I saw her as a tree.. I saw myself, as a vine wrapping myself around her to give her love.... I guess that was where I screwed up, she will grow tired of me........Shit, not again!!!!!

 

[Tiger Kitten]

This has been on my mind for a bit. Aren't there trees that can't survive without vines? Some sort of symbiotic relationship or something? I will have to do some research lol.

 

[anthony]

Aren't there trees that can't survive without vines?

Probably... it all comes down to what you are happy with, though the bigger picture is extremely accurate. Living organisms usually evolve and learn how to continue living without something it may have been dependent upon for a long time. This is evolution!

 

[rjtransient]

"Your relationship with this person is best described as, the thorn hurts the vine, who needs help anyway."

I can see this. Both my previous long-term relationship and the recent dates I've been on have involved dependent men, and I'm the sharp catalyst who tries to keep things interesting. Gotta work on attracting people who can hold their own without either becoming aggressive or waiting for me to make every decision. I know they're out there. . .

 

[Tiger Kitten]

Living organisms usually evolve and learn how to continue living without something it may have been dependent upon for a long time. This is evolution!

While I agree with the bigger picture of the relationship test. I see it from a slightly different angle. I evolved to the point of being alone and able to stand alone. I am working now on being able to depend on other people for support. In my case, I am trying to fix the mistakes I have made in adapting to the world as I thought I should be. What I learned growing up was that I was to be dependent on others for everything. What I saw when I left my family was that people didn't need to be dependent on others. I then forced myself to become totally independent of everything. Now I am trying to be able to depend on others when I need to instead of gritting my teeth and white knuckling my way through everything by myself.

There has to be a happy medium. That's what I have trouble seeing right now. That is probably what the trees are supposed to symbolize. They can live together in the forest without the support of each other, but they like being in the forest because then they have less of a chance of getting struck by lightening. Perhaps if one gets struck by lightening or has a flaw that makes the wind dangerous the other can shelter it until it heals enough to stand alone again.

Please forgive the rambling. It's just started me thinking.

Tiger

 

[anthony]

Thinking is good Tiger... and see... you are already evolving from what I just read. You are changing your approach to relationships... evolution! Well done. It is not uncommon that people will be a thorn a vine a tree at different times within their life and relationships with different people. You will get a different response when you apply this test across different people, ie. family, friends and partner. You will be the constant though.

 

[anni]

Sigh. As per usual I didn't even know there was anything to be done under the 'forms' menu. Must get over this navigational phobia because boy do I mess a LOT.

I got to be a tree! I think it's because 'this time' I'm feeling incredibly supported and know my support is just as important to his life. I was going to say 'vine' because it's terribly hard to recognise anything at all of value in myself, much less being important to someone else. In thinking about the test while trying to be terribly objective I know we could stand by ourselves if we had to, as individuals.

Very nice to know! Thank you, Anthony!

Anni

 

[onebravegirl]

HA! I'm a tree, he's a vine. Figures. Sometimes I get tired of being the tree but at least he doesn't block the sunlight!
O

 

[naturalfirebrand]

I have recently married for the 3rd time. What I learned from the first two helped in this relationship.

I accepted nothing less than a tree.