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How Did You Sleep Last Night?

YEH I wake up at 4 am most times with a jolt sometimes more often. if I have a string of bad nights then I seem to sleep and sleep. Then the cycle starts again.:arghh;:arghh;:sleep::sleep::sleep::arghh;:arghh;:sleep::sleep:
 
I had very broken up sleep last night. I dreamed at one point that my father shot me at close range with a pellet gun right in the middle of my forehead. I spent the rest of this dream yelling at him and telling him never to do that again in a very loud screaming voice. Then I woke up. I think also, that my head had been hurting on and off yesterday, so I may well have had a headache when I dreamed this.

In real life, I loved my father toward the later years of his life, but in his younger years, when I was a child, we were often at odds. I guess this dream was about that earlier time when we were both younger.

I was shocked by this dream, like how could I think that my father would do such a thing. I also felt guilty about the dream, like how coul,d I think such a thing about my father.
 
My sleep was nervous sleep last night. I did not want to go to bed. I wanted to sleep all night on the couch listening to a TV series but I didn't I went to bed. I did mindfulness meditation as soon as I woke up (after snuggling of course) to bring down the anxiety.
 
Didn't sleep at all yet. Overtired and overwrought, I think. It's 20 to 7 in the morning here right now, and I will be in bed by 7, which means I won't be up till 12 or 1, but that's still plenty of time for me to get the chicken for dinner in the oven, at least.
 
My sleep was restless a little concerned sleep last night. I didn't I went to bed. I avoided for an hour. I did mindfulness meditation as soon as I woke up to bring down the anxiety. I wrapped myself up in a cocoon of doona as well. Did some Alexander Technique so I don't carry the panic with me into the day. Then I had a bath to melt down some of the stiffness that comes from bracing in my sleep. So managing it a bit better.
 
I am wide awake at 3:39AM and have been since around 2:30AM. I awake with this pressing thing I have been wanting to do for quite some time now and could not go back to sleep. Last night I did not sleep well either, maybe only getting 5 hours of sleep or less. I hate this!

I could not recall my dreams just now, but they must have been to do with this pressing matter somehow. That's all I can figure out.
 
I woke at 3.39 am and I was not having a panic attack. I woke up to the day being calm and collection. I wasn't having nightmares. I wasn't distressed. I didn't have to run to the freezer and get an ice pack and put it on the back of my neck before doing yoga nidra or the body scan. It didn't take me hours to get the anxiety down so I could start function. I just did a couple of hours of mindfulness meditation. My mind wasn't galloping away with distorted throughts and perceptions. I slept well last night.
 
Sleep recently has become something more like a myth rather than reality. I can't give exact numbers, but I would guess I'm running somewhere around 40hrs since I last shut my eyes for approximately an hour. Lol I don't even know how long my stretch was before that when I got some shut eye. It's all a haze and jumbled together. My sense of time and day and night have all become a constant.
I have gone through two bottles of eye drops in a time frame I would guess you would maybe use maybe just two regular applications. My eyes are blood.
BUT I'm gonna get motivated right after this and get myself together because I have to go see the good ole VA doc. Get my medicine FINALY that I have now been with out for tooooo long. These are good things. I was the one that suffered and still going to suffer until my med levels build back up. But I can't control the USPS and their delivery methods. So oh well. I really look forward to getting back to what I assume is normal and better. SLEEP will come again and that makes me look forward to that.
Good luck to those who also struggle
And cheers to those who are enjoying thos Z's WINNING!!!!
 
Had my typical flashback nightmare. I'm hoping to not have that again tonight, but my housemate was listening to stand up with rape jokes... even those small things are triggering. Going to have some peppermint and chamomile tea. Hopefully that helps ☺
 

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